Malibu Puns

Training Day

https://youtu.be/8C716C8V9bQ

Malibu’s Most Wanted

https://youtu.be/AC7szRVX78E

So we can assume that the movie Training Day exists in the Malibu’s Most Wanted universe and given how popular that movie and Denzel are, Terry Crews’s character 8 Ball would’ve likely seen Terry Crews portraying a gangsta and maybe that was the start of his thugging aspirations

Ye hate to see it

Edit. I had to take the likely out of the title of the headline for character count

Edit 2. I was wrong, Crews’s first film was 6th Day. Also I used Gangsta largely because MMW but also character limits

Picture it... Sicily, 1945... Actually, it’s 2002, somewhere in the US. It’s Oktoberfest, at an Irish Pub that has an OUTSTANDING beer selection. You want it, we probably got it. The crowd at this amazingly awesome (no sarcasm, truly one of the best I’ve been to in the US, food, folks, and beer wise) establishment is somewhat, umm, collectively diverse.

It’s about 2200hrs (10pm), people are sloshed from the pub crawl, and a 3 city block outdoor Beergarten. Intense, to say the least. A raucously excellent time, but without any real issues. We’ve got early 2000s hipsters, yuppies, Paris Hilton wannabes, an older crowd, all types of folks are shoved in this 2 story madhouse. We stopped serving the full menu around 1900hrs (7pm) but there are pretzels, bratwurst, beer cheese, what have you outdoors. For 3 goddamn blocks. Plenty of carbs to soak up all the libations that have been poured down your gullet. Huge signs. Couldn’t miss ‘em.

Your girl here is upstairs slinging beers, having a ridiculously fun time, and here comes Paris’ hush-money, half-sister with less plastic and fake hair. You could smell her knockoff Chanel No. 5, and vodka cranberries a good 40 feet before you ever saw her over-contoured, Max Factor pancake makeup-ed, glossy eyelid and glitter-lipped face. I’m not judging, just setting the scene. Take it how you will.

Perriss decides it’s high time to saunter over to invade my and my guests wicked cool gathering, and make her presence obnoxiously known. A highly intoxicated baby Bambi on stilts, cresting a freshly frozen pond, ambulated better than this chic. She crawls her way through the 5 deep gathering of patrons waiting patiently in front of me, whilst scream-slurring what heinous concoction her drunk ass required IMMEDIATELY. Forget the fact there’s a slew of well-behaved, well-mannered friends in front of her. They step aside and let her through. I caught the eyes of a handful of guests, and they knew... some backwards-ass shit was about to go down.

Great Value Malibu Barbie lays her torso across the bar, grabbing for me. I saunter up, “hey there. Whatcha drinking?” (Clearly not about to put alcohol within her reach.)

GVMB: “lonsh eyes teeeee.”

Me: “aw-ight.” Pours water, coke, a splash of grenadine, and some lemons in a glass, slide it to her. “$7.50, peaches.”

GVMB: “dish yeer jush calls muh a bish?”

Me: “pardon? My Russian is a bit rusty.”

Slur of verbal diarrhea of whatever the fuck else she was trying to say, & I was

PayPal G/S, shipped in the USA

timestamp

SOLD (B) $75 555 mini grip original owner, hasn't got much use so passing it on, has been disassembled and carried. Includes box and pouch. Solid lockup with free swinging action, centered.

SOLD (B-) $215 Malibu wharncliffe original owner, has skiff bearings installed(originals included), so it has been disassembled. Scratch in ano on clip side scale running length of the clip(picture 7). Other than that amazing knife with great action, solid lock up, and has been carried.

SOLD (B) $425 Slysz Bowie KJ Exclusive original owner, you know the drill, wanted one, got one, need to move money around. Has been carried and there is a small mark in the ano(picture 5) that you can't see in the picture or unless you hold it in the right light but it is there. Also picture 7 scratch on clip side scale. Knifejoy sticker included.

https://imgur.com/gallery/QmxfuVg

I got this Malibu from a previous trade, and I do love the knife. It is such a great build and flipper/fidget machine. But I recently got a smock, and in my opinion, a smock does what I want better than the Malibu.

Anyways, I’ll give A-rating. I’ve carried a couple times, only cut tape. Never sharpened, never touch with a screw driver.

TV 200. I’m not sure what I’m looking to trade for in particular. Offers welcome.

Edit. I’ll change rating to B+

Hello up for trade first are these two beauties. The microtech is a ultratech hellhound with blued titanium hardware, only one of its kind I’ve seen before, was recently sent to microtech where they put a new edge and clip on it grading it a C for wear Tv:380, next is the Malibu, nothing special just a Malibu in aight condition grade B Tv:200. What I’m really looking for is anything with a hellhound blade but shoot your offers, looking to do a 2 for 1 trade, if interested in buying both let me know and I will consider if no trades come through. Sorry for formatting on mobile. https://imgur.com/a/DumEejL