Bad Rob Lowe pun imgur.com/ZyOJ1
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fruitrollupsalad
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2012
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I like my women like a pile of Lowe’s precut studs:

Cheap, stacked and knotty

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πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2021
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Just got back from Lowe’s where I picked up a cool new gadget.

Solar powered clippers attached to a drone that I can program to do most of my landscaping.

It’s real Cutting Hedge Technology.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Krusty100
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2020
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This Is A Paid advertisement: Have a home project you’re working on? For a limited time, Lowes Home Improvement is now selling Levels 2 for the price of 1!

Multi-level marketing

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BHarcade
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2020
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Robe Lowe prefers pure, uncut cocaine.

Rob Lowe loves raw blow.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Uncleherpie
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2020
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Tip of the day: The toilets at Lowes are just for display.

(they should put signs on those, or something..)

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MagicGuy66
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2019
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Walking into Lowes with my father in-law, he got my brother in-law and I good.

As we are getting close to walking into the store we walk past three gentlemen standing outside and one of them is holding some lumber. My father in-law looks at them and says "Must be having an important board meeting, carry on gentlemen".

We died laughing.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Praefectus27
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2019
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Walking through the garden section in Lowes

Step daughter " These rocks smell the candy."

Me "Would you say they smell like rock candy?"

Her facial expression was priceless

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JelloVV
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2018
🚨︎ report
At Lowes today the intercom lady says β€œSpecial Assistance Needed in the Blind Cutting Area.”

insert your dad’s joke here.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Superd3n
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2017
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So my dad told me he was going to Lowe's..

"What are you getting there?" I asked.

"An Irish guy," he replied.

"What?"

"Patio furniture!"

"...what?"

"An Irish guy! Patty O' Furniture!"

πŸ‘︎ 55
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MitchManGuy
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2015
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Lowe's: A place for dads

At Lowe's volunteering my truck to move some lumber that a friend is using to make his girlfriend shelves. He and I are standing with the boards, distracting her kids while she settles up at the counter. Among the continuous babble from her youngest was "I'm thirsty." Simultaneously from three directions around him, my friend and I and a passing Lowe's employee:

"Hi thirsty, I'm Mike!" "Hi thirsty, I'm Dave!" "Hi thirsty, I'm Neil!"

We all shared a moment while mom shot us the most exhausted and disappointed look I've ever seen.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BubbaFeets
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23 2014
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Dad Joked Mom in Lowes

I'm an Mech. Engineering student and we are shopping for a new toilet in lowes.

Me upon seeing the kohler toilets: "they are recruiting engineers next week at our college" "I don't think I want to work for a toilet company though"

Mom: "well they probably make good money"

Me: "yeah but I hear it's a shitty job"

A groan came from both her and the lowes employee who was helping us.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/oneevilchicken
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2014
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Awkward encounter at Lowes today

I was purchasing a Square and level, an older man comes up to me and says "Don't worry I think you're innocent............. because you're obviously framed." I had to think for a while and he explained it was funny because of the tools I had in my hand.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/diddy403
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2014
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Anyone interested in buying my Delorean? Great condition, low mileage...

Only driven from time to time.

πŸ‘︎ 422
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πŸ‘€︎ u/justshtmypnts
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2021
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My Dad is hopelessly addicted to going to different hardware stores every weekend.

Every Saturday, I see him hitting new Lowe’s.

πŸ‘︎ 958
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2021
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Do they allow loud laughing in Hawaii?

……..

Or just a low ha? Don’t downvote me πŸ₯ΊπŸ‘‰πŸ‘ˆ

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2021
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I'm unsure if I've set the bar too low for this joke

I'm in limbo..

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dinnen1
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2021
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Do you think jugglers who live in houses with low ceilings...

Have lofty dreams?

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πŸ“…︎ May 13 2021
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Ever heard of the god with low self-esteem?

He's an atheist.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FacelessPoet
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2021
🚨︎ report
Low Effort Post

https://i.imgur.com/wve7RaB.jpg

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LAHAROFDEATH
πŸ“…︎ May 18 2021
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I had nothing to do so I thought of personally mixing the small leaves of a low-growing aromatic plant of the mint family.

But I knew I’d end up with too much Thyme on my hands

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AndrewMacSydney
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2021
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Low effort high yield.
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πŸ“…︎ Apr 14 2021
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Low effort puns are my favorite.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ketannn
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2021
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What Do You Call a Russian with Low Blood/Oxygen Content?

Hammer and Sickle Cell Anemic!

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2021
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Someone broke into my garage last night, stole my tools and stuff, but I can't believe they took my limbo stick too.

Seriously..how low can you go ?

πŸ‘︎ 135
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2021
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I always had low charisma when I chose elf in D&D.

Maybe that's why I have such low elf-esteem.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RPawesomeness
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19 2021
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Penny production with Abraham Lincoln’s face seems to be quite low this year.

It’s only one percent.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cabbithunt
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2021
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I hope the standards of this sub are low enough
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πŸ‘€︎ u/yomamama69
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2021
🚨︎ report
Low effort joke. (Click on the image) youtu.be/W277dONbnzs
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πŸ‘€︎ u/UnsteadyKoala
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2021
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People ask me why I still work as a mailman,on such low salary.

I tell them : "Its not about the money; Its about sending a message"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/rhshi14
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2021
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My doctor texted me that I was suffering from low magnesium

"0mg", I replied

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πŸ‘€︎ u/professorf
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2021
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Why are Sherlock Holmes' taxes so low?

He's a master of deduction

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SolgaleoGamePlays
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2020
🚨︎ report
Dad jokes are low hanging fruit and here's why

Why

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Phuckingidiot
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2021
🚨︎ report
My extremely low effort drawn out pun. What’s it trying to say?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/C3Slayer
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2020
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Why did the Indian yeast have low self esteem?

His whole life he’s been a naan starter.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tim_breeding
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2020
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There are 2 types of people: 1) people who make inferences over low amounts of information

Get it?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LightningClone
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2020
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My fiance's father has forbidden our fruit themed wedding in Vegas...

Looks like we cantaloupe.

Edit: I'm sorry all. I know this is an especially low hanging fruit. Hell, it's practically on the ground.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Solest044
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2021
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A Physicist Walks into a Therapists office...

Doc: Tell me how you're feeling

Physicist: I'm low on energy and I'm beginning to think nothing matters.

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2021
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What do we want? Low flying airplane noises

When do we want them? Nyoow

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Connor0388
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2020
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I noticed that Marvel aren't going very much promotion for their new upcoming tv series...

They want to keep it low key

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πŸ‘€︎ u/andstep234
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05 2021
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Was planning a big announcement that I’m watching the new Marvel TV show.

But I’m keeping it low key.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/vbloke
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2021
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My Dad and the Home Depot Bucket.

When I was 15 there was a Home Depot bucket next to the front door for a while. One night I was watching tv with my mom. She was laying on the couch and I was laying on the floor.

My dad got home from work and as he was taking off his boots he asked β€œHey, where did that Home Depot bucket come from?” And without skipping a beat I said β€œI don’t know. Home Depot?” My mom laughed so hard and my dad was pissed. I got grounded for a week for β€œbeing a smart ass”.

I’m now 26 and to this day when my dad and I go to Home Depot I always chuckle and point to the buckets and ask β€œHey dad, where do you think those come from.”

On one of these trips I picked one up and was examining it when my dad asked me what I was looking for. I turned the bucket upside down and said β€œWell would you look at that dad. They’re from Lowe’s.” I thought he was gonna knock my ass out right there.

TLDR: My dad: β€œWhere did that Home Depot bucket come from?” Me: β€œI don’t know. Home Depot?”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Malfoy1743
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2021
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Due to complaints, Hawaii passed a law where you're not allowed to laugh above a certain decibel

You can only use a low ha

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Da_Brootalz
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2021
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I'm sure he could pull it off

- Did you hear Thor's brother performed at the drag festival?
- No, I did not. How was it?
- It was pretty low-key.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ANDYmk50
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2021
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I don't trust people who don't like mushrooms.

Clearly they are of low Morel fibre.

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2021
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What would you call a dress for a cow?

A moo-moo.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DENelson83
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2021
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Why didn't the Grandmaster in Ragnarok know who Thor's brother was?

Was the information being kept low-key?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LOLSteelBullet
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2021
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Marvelous secret

Tom Hiddleston was on the radio earlier saying he couldn't reveal anything about his new TV series.

He has to keep details Low-key...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LostBoyNav
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2021
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I was gonna tell you guys an economics joke

But they're in high demand

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheBreadSkeleton
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2021
🚨︎ report
If Rob Lowe.....

....if Rob Lowe could Rob Lowe's how many Lowe's would Rob Lowe Rob?

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/2donutkid2
πŸ“…︎ Oct 27 2018
🚨︎ report
At Lowes...

(on loudspeaker): "Customer assistance needed in the blind cutting area. Customer assistance needed in the blind cutting area."

Dad: "Why are they cutting blind people?!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tananar
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2014
🚨︎ report
Anyone out there interested in buying my DeLorean ? Great condition, low mileage..

.. really only driven from time to time.

πŸ‘︎ 713
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HugoZHackenbush2
πŸ“…︎ Apr 19 2021
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Why do Deloreans always have such low mileage?

They’re only driven from from time to time

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BobSagieBauls
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2021
🚨︎ report
Do they allow loud laughing in Hawaii?

Or just a low ha?

πŸ‘︎ 147
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bttrflyr
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2021
🚨︎ report
Do they allow loud laughter in Hawaii?

Or just a low ha?

πŸ‘︎ 91
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Falcia
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28 2021
🚨︎ report
Is laughing allowed in Hawaii?

Or just a low β€œHa,”?

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Checker_of_Vibes1
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2021
🚨︎ report
Does Hawaii allow loud laughs?

Or just a low ha?

πŸ‘︎ 61
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jigsatics
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2021
🚨︎ report

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