No it was Witch two officer!
The questions is, will Neil Patrick Harris on the back?
so im talking to this girl and her name is wisdom. Im horrible at coming up with puns/pick up lines and Im trying to think of a funny one but I cant. help.
He was being a reel crank.
It was all Hans on deck!
Barbie queue
He picks up the ketchup bottle, glances at it and gives a hearty chuckle before slathering his brat in ketchup.
Puzzled, the woman watches as the next customer, a young girl, walks up to order her hot dog.
As she takes the container of relish, she bursts into a fit of giggles and walks off with her food, still laughing merrily.
A middle-aged man steps up next. Shoveling sauerkraut onto his hot dog, he laughs uproariously and walks away grinning.
When she reaches the front of the line, the woman asks the hot dog vendor,
“Excuse me, sir, but why does everyone laugh when they get their hot dogs?”
“It’s simple, ma’am.” he says, handing her a piping-hot sausage. “I’m surprised you haven’t discovered for yourself.”
Glancing at the mustard, the woman lets loose a peal of laughter.
“Ya see, ma’am? The real_joke’s always in the condiments!"
You simply WEED 'em out
This would be funny but there’s no punchline
So I figure a pick up truck should cover both bases
Ford Ranger
Nissan Navara
Toyota Hilux
Mitsubishi Strada
A queuecumber
My sister said, oh no, it almost fell out! You butter watch it! ;D
I’m so proud of her, I’ve raised her well
Hey gourd-geous! Wanna go back to my place and squash?
So he just yelled out, "What on Earth are you talking about?".
So I'm having lunch with the family, and a girl walks in with a Google t shirt.
My dad leans in to me and whispers, "You should go ask that girl if she's 'searching' for you..."
Edit: told my dad about the turnout of this post during dinner and he told me he'd turn my Moto X phone into a Moto Ex phone if I kept using it during family meals. Looks like the fun never ends...
There just plug and play
Picking up the torn pages, his friend asked, “Why Euripides?”
Well you're always going to have a Gouda time with me!... 😉😜
I'm a smooth operator.
Punchline.
'cause he was Stalin!
I'm font of you bc you're my type ;) Ok don't kill me bye
The customer service was an F’in joke
It really pissed me off. So the next day I got there early and taught his kid how to ride a bike.
And you can never get that back
These two ladies (Around 50) were making small talk with this barista of the same age, when he said, "Why didn't you take your mask off?" to one of them. I guess they didn't know what he was talking about and just shrugged it off with an awkward laugh, then he landed it: "You went as a beauty-queen, right?"
Darling, you look GOURD-EOUS!!
I just need some space
"It's in the Heisenberg-street.", she said, "Do you know where that is?"
"No," I said, "but I know how fast you can go there."
She didn't get it.
So, my mother is British, and my dad was studying in the UK (he's American) when they met.
Dad: So... do you have any American in you?
Mom: No..
Dad: Would you like one?
"Oh man, I'm jelly. "
"Hey jelly, I'm peanut butter"
