Going to treat myself to Velcro shoes, instead of laces.
π︎ 86
π
︎ Nov 04 2020
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer...
Don't know what they were laced with, but I was tripping all day.
π︎ 345
π
︎ Feb 08 2021
What's made of leather and sounds like a sneeze?
π︎ 14k
π
︎ Oct 29 2020
The only dad joke I know. My friend asked me to post it. :-)
I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer.
I don't know what he laced them with but I've been trippin' all day!
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︎ Dec 29 2020
I prefer shoe-laces because Velcro is a rip-off.
π︎ 109
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︎ Sep 06 2019
My son was being very noisy attaching cross-laced string to an oval frame. I had to tell him...
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︎ Jan 01 2020
You heard about the British pig that ties shoe laces very well?
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︎ Nov 29 2019
Shoe laces
Wife calls me over to the computer.
Wife: Honey, can you take a look at these shoes for our daughter? They are shock cord bur I don't see a tightener. And I dont know if they tie.
Me: Well, maybe they are Vietnamese.
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︎ Aug 05 2019
My first time doing puns in real life. Ik it's horrible
So today, I had a conversation with my friend while walking home from school. At one point my lace untied and he pointed that out to me while we were walking past a 7eleven. I am horrible at making puns so forgive me. I shall call him J
J: You u should tie up your shoes
Me(pointing to the lays packet in the store): I can't be bothered tying my shoe-lays
J: You should stop spread them all around the "play-se" (place)
Me: Well maybe you should stop lay-zing around and actually study(he couldn't reply to that cuz all he does is lay-ing around aimlessly. Haha! See what I did there!)
Conversation deviates
Me: come follow me to Cheers let's look for a giftcard
J: nah
Me: get your lay-z ass over to cheers u ungrateful bitch! u make my life lays miserables
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︎ Aug 18 2020
No laces but I'm still tripping
π︎ 30
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︎ Jan 31 2018
Never trust a shoe salesman who doubles as a drug dealer
As a sole provider they'll likely get you something that's laced.
π︎ 8
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︎ Jun 10 2020
I like my women like my laces...
π︎ 5
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︎ Oct 07 2018
TIL that NASA had to develop a new way to tie the laces on the boots of the space suit
It's called an Astro knot
π︎ 12
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︎ Dec 10 2017
You know no one ever teaches a shoe lace to tie itself
Yeah I guess you could say they're self taut
π︎ 4
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︎ Dec 21 2017
Did you hear? Thereβs going to be a movie about the best shoes in the world!
Itβs going to be a feeture film!
π︎ 4
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︎ May 25 2020
My shoe laces must have been made my a drug dealer.
Because Iβm always tripping.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jan 18 2018
If someone ever made potato chips laced with THC, they could call them Blayz
π︎ 2
π
︎ Apr 06 2016
π︎ 4
π
︎ Nov 10 2014
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer.
I don't know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
π︎ 93
π
︎ Feb 12 2021
I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer.
I don't know what he laced them with but I was tripping all day.
π︎ 21
π
︎ Feb 10 2021
Never buy shoes from a drug dealer...
I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day.
π︎ 19
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︎ Feb 24 2021
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer, not sure what he laced them with...
But I was trippin all day!
π︎ 14
π
︎ May 18 2020
They were high-tops
I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what they were laced with but I was tripping all day.
π︎ 14
π
︎ Feb 11 2021
I bought some new shoes from my drug dealer today...
I have no idea what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day!
π︎ 47
π
︎ Jan 09 2021
I bought a pair of shoes from this drug dealer yesterday
I don't know what he laced them with, but I was tripping the whole day.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Dec 25 2020
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer...
Donβt know what he laced them with, but Iβve been tripping all day
π︎ 158
π
︎ Oct 11 2020
I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer. I donβt know what he laced them with but Iβve been tripping all day.
π︎ 21
π
︎ Aug 21 2019
So I bought some new shoes from a drug dealer yesterday. I donβt know what he laced them with but Iβve been tripping all day
π︎ 21
π
︎ Aug 10 2019
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer.
I donβt know what he laced them with, but Iβve been tripping all day.
π︎ 39
π
︎ Sep 13 2020
I think my shoes were laced with acid.
I've been tripping all day.
π︎ 9
π
︎ May 03 2019
Bought some shoes from my drug dealer
I don't know what the hell he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day
π︎ 41
π
︎ Jul 27 2020
I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer.
I don't know what he laced them with but I've been tripping all day.
π︎ 18
π
︎ Sep 23 2020
The other day I bought some shoes from a drug dealer
Man, I donβt know what he laced them with, but Iβve been tripping all day.
π︎ 37
π
︎ Sep 12 2020
What sounds like a sneeze and is made of leather?
π︎ 1k
π
︎ Nov 25 2019
Bought some shoes from a drug dealer
I don't know what they laced it with,but I've been trippin' all day
π︎ 9
π
︎ Jul 27 2020
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer
I don't know what he laced them with but I've been tripping all day
π︎ 13
π
︎ Aug 17 2020
I just bought these new shoes from a shady drug dealer.
I don't know what he laced them with but I've been tripping all day.
π︎ 20
π
︎ Apr 04 2020
Why do younever buy a pair of shoes from a drug dealer?
Because you don't know what he laces them with and you'll be tripping all day.
π︎ 339
π
︎ Feb 22 2020
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer
I donβt know what he laced em with, but I was trippin all day.
π︎ 58
π
︎ Jun 28 2020
I once bought shoes from a drug dealer...
I don't know what they were laced with, but I've been tripping all day
π︎ 359
π
︎ Jan 24 2020
I bought shoes from a drug dealer
Iβm not sure what he laced them with, but Iβve been tripping all day
π︎ 56
π
︎ Feb 24 2020
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer today
I donβt know what he laced them with but I was tripping the whole day.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jul 17 2020
I bought some shoes from my drug dealer
And I don't know what he laced them with, i'm tripping all day
π︎ 36
π
︎ Mar 19 2020
I recently bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer
Not sure what he laced them with but i have been tripping all day.
π︎ 34
π
︎ Feb 12 2020
I bought shoes from a drug dealer one time
Idk what he laced them with, I was tripping all day!
π︎ 5
π
︎ May 05 2020
I got these shoes from my drug dealer
I donβt know what he laced them with but Iβm trippinβ
π︎ 57
π
︎ Dec 30 2019
I just bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer
I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day.
π︎ 66
π
︎ Dec 06 2019
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