I hired a carpenter, but she'll only work on the walls, ceiling joists, doorframes, and windows.

Apparently floors are beneath her.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nemo_sum
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2017
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Roofing jokes get to me

...every shingle time.

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SoDakZak
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2017
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Here's TWO-FER. A little long for a Dad joke, but I do feel they fit the "Zone"

A man is on his first visit to Boston, and he wants to try some of that delicious New England seafood that he'd long heard about. So he gets into a cab, and asks the driver, "Can you take me to where I can get scrod?" The driver replies, "I've heard that question a thousand times but never in the pluperfect subjunctive."

An Irishman goes to a building site for his first day of work, and a couple of Englishmen think, "Ah, we'll have some fun with him!" So they walk up and say, "Hey, Paddy, as you're new here make sure you know a joist from a girder..." "Ah, sure, I knows" says Paddy, "twas Joyce wrote Ulysses and Goethe wrote Faust."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/apikoros18
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2019
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