Ya, most users are taking the Lord's name in vein.
His picture only requires one nail to hang
Jesus Christosaurus?
βJohn, 3:16
"Me!"
Me: Jesus christ! (Or God!)
Dad: Yes?
"What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?" "Supplies!"
In essence, Jesus is never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down, never gonna run around and desert you.
It bumped into another cell and screamed "Jesus Christ!!" God was not happy, he said "You should never use the Lords name in vein."
Quite deceitful.
Jesus Christ what have you done to me!
Unless youβre prepared for the reaper cushions.
The calfeteria!
I canβt post on this subreddit.
It was somewhere around the 6th century after the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ, an Anglish man was travelling through Normandy when he sees a local labouring the fields, and asks:
"Hello. What does it take to become a mercenary amongst your King's regiments?"
"Not that much - to be Frank."
"I see. I better give up then.
Because he was told to get a long little doggie.
http://m.imgur.com/gallery/8FMv6d1
Itβs capital has been Dublin every year.
But Stephen Hawking ran on batteries.
My dad is 80.....i'm 53. My sister gave him some stockings (like knee socks) from the Vatican that the Pope supposedly wears. Don't ask why it's not important. Odd gift but anyway.....
Dad: "Hmmm.... well that present couldn't be any holier."
Me: "Well if the socks had holes in them they would be holier."
My Dad: "jesus christ" <while stifling a chuckle>
my 20ish adult Kids: <blank stare and power down look>
I was so proud.
Bad Minton.
If I would get to be the dad of a son, I'd name him Jason so on the moment of his birth I can get up and shout: "Jesus Christ, it's Jason, born!"
If you create puns and don't write them down, they evaporate into the aether, but if you post them to /r/puns, they will stay on the Ethernet.
He frowned a little.
"What's that?" he asked.
"Anything these days," I said.
"Huh?" he asked.
"Anything these days," I said.
"I don't understand. Explain?" he asked.
"Anything these days," I said.
He sighed loudly.
"Are you crazy, dad?" he asked.
"Anything these days," I said.
"Dad, snap out of it. What's going on?" he asked.
"Anything these days," I said.
"Dad! Dad! Come on. Tell me what you mean?" he asked.
There was a pause.
"Anything these days," I continued.
At this point he was enraged and yelled, "Jesus Christ, I've had enough of this nonsense. What on Earth are you doing? Have you lost your mind? Jees. You're driving me insane!"
There was a silence.
"This is the world we live in," I concluded. "You can't say anything these days without offending someone."
Sally was at Sunday school, when she fell asleep. The teacher realizes this and says, βSally who is the creator of life?β Her friend, Colin, who sat behind her. Poked her with a needle to wake her up. She wakes with a jump and yells, βGOD ALMIGHTYβ The teacher responds, βVery good Sally.β Soon later, Sally falls back asleep. The teacher, again notices and says to her, βSally who is our savior?β Colin again, pokes her with a needle. Sally jumps up and yells, βJESUS CHRIST!β The teacher responds, βVery good.β For a third time Sally falls asleep. The teacher, having enough of it, asked, βSally, what did Eve say to Adam after they had their 17th child?.β Colin again, pokes Sally with a needle to wake her up. She jumps up and yells, βI SWEAR TO GOD, if you shove that thing in me one more time, Iβm going to rip it from you, and shove up your throat!β
Yeeeeeeee^eeeee^eeees?
Jesus Christ did
It's pastorized.
"Jesus Christ, look at the time!"
