So I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?"

He said "How flexible are you?". I said "I can't make Tuesdays".

πŸ‘︎ 37
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Merlin-5
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2021
🚨︎ report
What did the frenchman think about his skydiving instructor?

He was a descent guy.

πŸ‘︎ 29
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CyberOGa3
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you know Cardi B has a sister who’s a fitness instructor?

Her name is Cardi O

πŸ‘︎ 67
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MsToothFairy
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2020
🚨︎ report
On the first day of my flying lessons, I looked down nervously and asked my instructor, β€œWhat are all these buttons for?”

β€œThey are to keep your shirt done up” he replied.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cotswoldboy
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the yoga instructor say when he was asked to leave the building?

Nah I’ma stay.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2020
🚨︎ report
I had to quit my job as a deep sea diver instructor.

The pressure was too much.

πŸ‘︎ 66
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Anthonybrose
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2020
🚨︎ report
My sewing instructor just told me that I’m the worst student she has ever seen.

Shit. Wrong thread.

πŸ‘︎ 14k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2020
🚨︎ report
My army instructor told me he didn’t see me at camouflage practice today.

β€œThank you, sir!” I replied.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JammerJake2005
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2020
🚨︎ report
After an argument, my cooking instructor wants me to stew goose feathers gently below or just at the boiling point...

She wants me to simmer down!

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the socially distanced yoga instructor say to her students

Nama stay six feet apart from people

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/chartman21
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2020
🚨︎ report
The other day my yoga instructor was drunk

It put me in quite an awkward position

πŸ‘︎ 40
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/st_jimmy_02
πŸ“…︎ May 30 2020
🚨︎ report
The instructor in my self defence class told me that the most effective place to kick a man is near his knees.

Personally, I think it’s nuts.

πŸ‘︎ 7k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2019
🚨︎ report
I thought taking a job as a ski instructor would be great.

But it really went downhill fast.

πŸ‘︎ 142
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/GreenSeaBreeze
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2020
🚨︎ report
Canadians make some of the greatest karate instructors.

It makes Sensei

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/arthritictongue
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2020
🚨︎ report
I started dating my yoga instructor.

Now we're friends with zenefits.

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2020
🚨︎ report
My Wing Chun instructor makes me bring him meals as part of my training.

He's on a Sifu diet.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Zaxxonn26
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2020
🚨︎ report
I quit my job as a scuba diving instructor the first day I was hired.

Deep down, I realized it wasn’t for me.

πŸ‘︎ 81
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the yoga instructor say in response to the eviction notice?

NamastΓ©

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Konamicoder
πŸ“…︎ Mar 31 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the stubborn man say when the yoga instructor tried to get hm to leave?

Nah, Imma stay (namaste)

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ICWhatsNUrP
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2020
🚨︎ report
I signed up for Yoga, and our new instructor is awesome.

She really bends over backwards for us.

πŸ‘︎ 120
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2019
🚨︎ report
I asked my skydiving instructor what I should do if my parachute doesn't work. He said when it comes to that, we'll figure it out on the fly.
πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Hank_the_Hand
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2019
🚨︎ report
(At yoga class) Instructor: "Any requests?"

Student 1: "Left quads please, and left shin" Student 2: "Never forget left day"

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/customgenitalia
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
🚨︎ report
If I ever became a scuba instructor that did group dives...

I’d like to be referred to as the β€œwetting planner.”

πŸ‘︎ 30
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/w00dw0rk3r
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2019
🚨︎ report
I applied for a job as an Instructor at a Scuba Diving center... The interviewer asked me if I can work well under pressure
πŸ‘︎ 26
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dubaidadjokes
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13 2019
🚨︎ report
What kind of car does a karate instructor drive?

A KiiiiiiiiiiiiiAhhhh!

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kevind360360
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2019
🚨︎ report
Instructor: Welcome to Salsa Class. Let's learn how to dance.

Me (hiding a bag of tortilla chips): There's been a misunderstanding.

πŸ‘︎ 54
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jan_Tik
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the locksmith have a side job as a piano instructor?

He always knows the right key

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/IHaveSacks
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2019
🚨︎ report
The clown and the parachute instructor

On the first day of training for parachute jumping, a clown listened intently to the instructor. He told them to start preparing for landing when they are at 300 feet.

The clown asked, β€œHow am I supposed to know when I’€™m at 300 feet?”

β€œThat’s a good question. When you get to 300 feet, you can recognize the faces of people on the ground.”

After pondering his answer, the clown asked, β€œWhat happens if there’s no one there I know?”

https://bestcleanfunnyjokes.com/the-clown-and-the-parachute-instructor/

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/tfraymond
πŸ“…︎ Sep 29 2019
🚨︎ report
Why can't you trust yoga instructors?

Because everything they do is quite a stretch.

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/but_thejokesbob
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2019
🚨︎ report
My instructor doesn’t think I’m cut out to be a mime.

It must have been something I said.

πŸ‘︎ 163
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 16 2018
🚨︎ report
I've opened a gym, where the instructors would go from door to door, to tell people about the benefits of joining it.

I've named it Jehovah's Fitness.

πŸ‘︎ 53
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/sodomicity
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2019
🚨︎ report
What is a bearded martial arts instructor's favorite bubble gum?

Kung Fu Man Chew

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/rideintips
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2019
🚨︎ report
Why are karate instructors easily upset

They’re sensei-tive.

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/gdubluu
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the guitar instructor go to prison?

He fingered a minor.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2018
🚨︎ report
I did yoga the other day, it was so much fun when the instructor told us to leave..

I said, Namaste.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/drupacshakurr
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2019
🚨︎ report
A yoga instructor Barbie comes with a KenGuru
πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PLUMBUM2
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2019
🚨︎ report
I just started dating my fitness instructor.

I really hope she works out.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/phillydog1
πŸ“…︎ Apr 05 2019
🚨︎ report
I was kicked out of the gym for fighting with my step aerobics instructor, but I don’t care.

She isn’t my real aerobics instructor.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05 2019
🚨︎ report
The marine instructor told us to stand down at the firing range, so I unloaded my weapon.

Yes, it was a strange time to masturbate and eventually lead to my dishonorable discharge.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2019
🚨︎ report
I asked my dad if I should quit my current job to be a pilates instructor instead.

He said to me, "son, that move will need some big balls."

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/td941
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13 2019
🚨︎ report
The first day of flying class, I looked down nervously and asked my instructor, β€œWow! What are all these buttons for?”

He said, β€œThey are used to keep your shirt closed.”

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2020
🚨︎ report
My sewing instructor thinks I’m the worst student she has ever seen.

Shit, wrong thread.

πŸ‘︎ 57
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2020
🚨︎ report
I quit my job as a scuba diving instructor after my first day at work.

Deep down I realized it wasn’t for me.

πŸ‘︎ 72
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you know Cardi B has a sister who’s a fitness instructor

Her names Cardi-O

πŸ‘︎ 43
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RogueOps
πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2019
🚨︎ report
I just quit my job as a scuba diving instructor.

Deep down, I realized it wasn’t for me.

πŸ‘︎ 94
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2019
🚨︎ report
I asked my gym instructor if he could teach me to do the splits. He said how flexible are you? I said I can’t do Fridays.
πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cwwspurs
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the yoga instructor say to his Mom she tried to leave?

Nah Ma, stay.

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mrtestcat
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2019
🚨︎ report
The instructor in my self defense class told me that the most effective place to kick a man is near his knees.

Personally, I think it’s nuts

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Nightman_82
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2019
🚨︎ report

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