A man walks into an ice cream parlor

and says, β€œGive me two scoops of chocolate.”

The guy behind the counter says, β€œI’m sorry sir, we’re out of chocolate.”

The man replies with, β€œwell, in that case...hm... give me two scoops of chocolate.”

The guy behind the counter says, β€œSir, I’m sorry but we’re out of chocolate.”

The man, thinking hard this time says, β€œWell, I want two scoops of chocolate.”

The guy behind the counter, now irate, says, β€œSir, can you spell the straw in strawberry?”

β€œS-T-R-A-W”

β€œCan you spell the van in vanilla?”

β€œV-A-N”

β€œCan you spell the fuck in chocolate?”

The man thinks for a second and says, β€œThere is no β€˜fuck’ in chocolate.”

The guy behind the counter slaps the countertop with his hand and says, β€œThat’s what I’ve been trying to tell you! There is no fuckin’ chocolate.”

πŸ‘︎ 28
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πŸ‘€︎ u/maaack3nzi3
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2018
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A panda walks into an ice cream parlor...

asked what it wants, the panda replies "Any bear-y flavor will do."

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/this_is_grand
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2018
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Why was the religious chef sacked from the ice-cream parlor?

He refused to work on sundaes.

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bigfoothobbit
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2017
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xpost from /r/writingprompts: A poorly-disguised escaped dairy cow has worked at an ice cream parlor... but now her bovine related puns is slowly starting to give her away.
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GoldenApple23
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2016
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Remembered this from when I was younger

Was on a family vacation to the beach and my sister, mom, dad and I were all in a local Ben and Jerry's getting some ice cream. Well the guy in front of us definitely had the Donald Trump hair going on and we all noticed. Out of nowhere, my dad turns around with a straight face and says,

"I'll pay for the ice cream this time, but you toupee next time."

I couldn't help but laugh and my mother had to walk out of the parlor. These comments are the reason why my father is my best friend

πŸ‘︎ 162
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πŸ“…︎ Apr 11 2016
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My dad is a dadjoke dad through and through. He usually doesn't get me but this one needed some recognition from my behalf.

My mom was showing him pictures of my cousin on her phone that had sent her pictures in front of a famous ice cream parlor back in our hometown. It was the parlor's 9th anniversary and my cousin was pictured in front of a big "9" in the store. My mom was explaining to my dad that the place had been open for 9 years and my dad replies with...

"Wow, that's impressive. How did they get the ice cream to not melt all this time?"

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bendary3
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2014
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