23 Hilarious Hymn Puns - Punstoppable 🛑

And now the pasta will lead us in a hymn...

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👤︎ u/Razabeth

📅︎ Jul 06 2019

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If a Christmas carol comes from a hymn, where do Halloween carols come from?

A hearse.

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👤︎ u/m2guru

📅︎ Oct 17 2020

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What do you call a hymn of embarrassment?

A facepsalm.

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👤︎ u/Mama_Bear15

📅︎ Sep 19 2019

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The pastor asked the congregation to skip verse 3 of the hymn,

but they refrained from that.

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👤︎ u/dutchraincloud

📅︎ Jun 02 2019

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What's a dentist's favorite hymn?

Crown Him With Many Crowns

(credit to my dad for his amazing sense of humor and terrible dental hygiene)

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👤︎ u/mandjari

📅︎ Jul 25 2016

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Learned a hymn on my trumpet today...

I told my dad about it and he asked me which one it was so I hummed it for him and he asks "are you sure that's a hymn?" and I answered, "Hmm, maybe it wasn't a hymn...maybe it was a her!"

Dadjoked my dad :)

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👤︎ u/odie1kenobi

📅︎ Sep 24 2015

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Hey can you play any hymns? "No but I can play..."

"...quite a few hers."

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👤︎ u/m0dulate

📅︎ Nov 28 2013

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I was looking for the sound track to Mortal Kombat

but all I could find was a bunch of Finnish Hymns.

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👤︎ u/skycooper11

📅︎ Mar 12 2021

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ABCDEFGHIJKLMNQRSTUVWXYZ

If you came here looking for an OP, you got it.

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👤︎ u/timmyb55

📅︎ Dec 05 2019

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The Nordic music store has a category just for Mortal Kombat.

Finnish Hymns

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👤︎ u/JoeFas

📅︎ Dec 28 2020

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What pillow set do the church organist and his wife have?

Hymn and Hers.

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👤︎ u/yyzable

📅︎ Aug 19 2020

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Epstein once paid a man to hang a shelf full of hymnals.

I guess he really didn’t hang hymn shelf.

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👤︎ u/MoodyToaster

📅︎ Jul 18 2020

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Why do they say amen instead of awomen in church?

Because they sing hymns instead of hers.

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👤︎ u/avery-secret-account

📅︎ May 16 2020

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Words I hate this season.

Apps,teen,did’nt,kill,hymns,elf

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👤︎ u/GRUBSTAR2

📅︎ Dec 11 2019

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What did Johnny Cage hear in Helsinki Cathedral?

FINNISH HYMN!!

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👤︎ u/TheAnagramancer

📅︎ Sep 11 2019

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Watching TV when...

My dad and I were watching a show where this guy gave this beautiful wooden and brass organ to a church. My dad said "that guy is an organ donor."

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👤︎ u/whippedcreamcheese

📅︎ Aug 28 2016

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Kim Kardashian & Kanye West named their new born Psalm West. I have only one question.

Is it a hymn or a her?

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👤︎ u/alisha40s

📅︎ May 18 2019

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Did you know God’s name is Andy?

It’s right there in the hymn

Andy walks with me, Andy talks with me, Andy tells me I am his own.

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👤︎ u/Trtlman

📅︎ Jun 26 2019

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Why did my Mortal Kombat obsessed friend visit a Nordic Church?

Finnish Hymns!

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👤︎ u/Upsidedownsquidhead

📅︎ Jan 05 2019

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At the end of prayers, why do people say 'amen' instead of 'our women'?

Because they sing hymns, not hers.

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👤︎ u/Frontier_Justice

📅︎ Oct 10 2015

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A new angle...

Got my wife in Church today. I asked her what the hymn number was, and she said, "360". I fully rotated the hymnal, and said, "I couldn't find it". She whispered louder, "THREE SIXTY". In mid second rotation she called me an asshole! In church! Tsk, tsk.

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👤︎ u/hardrockers77

📅︎ Sep 21 2014

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I tried to buy a mortal kombat soundtrack..

But all I could find is finnish hymns...

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👤︎ u/adamj91

📅︎ Dec 26 2020

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I tried to buy a Mortal Kombat soundtrack.

All I could find were Finnish Hymns.

(crosspost from r/jokes, sorry if you've reddit before)

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👤︎ u/PeoplesHero87

📅︎ Nov 01 2020

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