We are sitting at the dinner table after church. My sister says, "man, the choir director had me singing low today. I know I was singing lower than the tenors."
My dad without missing a beat, "Hmm. You must have been singing a niner."
I think I choked on my food from that one.
When talking about a former student throwing batteries at her, my teacher told us the student was later arrested for the incident "and charged with... you guessed it assault and BATTERY!!!!!"