What did the egg say to the house party?

Omelette!!!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spicoli0525
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2021
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We threw a house party that ended badly last night, my wife put her best friend in hospital with a single punch.

The worst fruit allergy I've ever seen.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/awesome_smokey
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2021
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When I moved into my new igloo, my awesome friends threw me a surprise house-warming party...

but now, I'm homeless.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JimmyLoramAtWork
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2021
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So the house cats went to the tigers engagement party.

The tigers were having a great time, roaring, baring teeth and in general having a great time. The cats were sitting quietly off to the side. The tigers asked the cats, β€œWhy so quiet ? Don’t you like to have some boisterous fun ?” The cats replied, β€œOh yes, we used to be tigers too. Until we got married.”

PS. (This sounded way better when my friend told me in the original Malayalam language slang poocha-pulee)

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Vinospam
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2021
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After my son’s team won the soccer game, the goalkeeper invited us to his house for a party.

It was the father, the son, and the goalie host.

πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2020
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A friend invited me to his house for a party

When I arrived, his house was on fire. Damn, the party must be lit.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cjyea124
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2020
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Do you know who shouldn’t have house warming parties?

Eskimos.

If they have a house warming party their house will melt.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jlionbad
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2020
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What does a house wear to a party?

Address.

πŸ‘︎ 849
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2018
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I threw a party tor all the workers who helped build my house. The door guy showed up late...

...but he really knew how to make an entrance.

πŸ‘︎ 53
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πŸ‘€︎ u/simplyGagi
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2019
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I had to kick a friend out of my house party.

He was pissing off the front porch

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πŸ‘€︎ u/isofakingwetoddid
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2019
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My Amish friend invited me to a house party this weekend!

We're about to get churnt up!

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pup_n_sudz
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2019
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Son: We should have a house warming party Dad.

Dad: (Moving to block the thermostat) a what now?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Radish00
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2019
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This happened at a recent Easter party at my wife’s colleague’s house:

It was a party mostly with parents and their children.

A kid (about 5 years old) stubbed his toe and started crying.

One of the dads said, β€œOh, you stubbed your toe? Want to to call the toe truck?”

I know it’s not fresh, but I laughed my ass off and was slightly bitter that I didn’t think of it.

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Papa-heph
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2019
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If the mushroom was such a fun guy why didn't they have the party at his house?

There wasn't much-room

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πŸ‘€︎ u/puggoamber
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2019
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This guy with OCD hosted a massive house party.

Things got pretty tidy.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2018
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I went to a friends house party and stumbled onto a cabinet full of jelly....

I guess you could say the party was jam-packed.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jokoboko
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2018
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Why is it always frustrating having deaf people over for your house party?

They can't stop cheating at charades.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ponyflash
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2017
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Dadjoked my friends at a house party.

My friend was having a house party with about 15-20 of our group of friends. The music was pumping everyone was drunk , hyper and we were all in her living room having a great time. On top of the fireplace was this little elephant ornament.

So I gathered everyone around, turned the music off and made a big deal of making it seem like I had something really important to say. I completely killed the mood but all in the name of a good joke, amiright? I say, with as straight a face as I can manage, "Listen, I know we're all friends here but I think its time we all talk about the elephant in the room... It's right over there on the fireplace".

Cue groans and a few laughs. Mostly groans though... So worth it.

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/googitygig
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2014
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Why was Saddam Hussein's house great for large parties?

It was full of Ba'ath rooms!

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Imbiss
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2016
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When I moved into my new igloo my friends threw me a surprise house-warming party.

Now I’m homeless.

πŸ‘︎ 44
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Randomguy6282
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2020
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My friends threw a house warming party in my new igloo.

Now, I'm homeless.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2020
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What does a house wear to a party?

Address.

πŸ‘︎ 104
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RedditisContent
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2018
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Do I threw a party for everyone who built my house

The Door guy showed up late. He always likes to make an entrance

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CHEEZY_21
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2019
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What does a house wear to a party?

Address

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheGreatTitanic
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2018
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What does a house wear to a party?

Adress.

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2018
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What does a house wear to a party?

Address

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pvzkernelpult
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2018
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If mushroom was such a fun guy why didn't they have a party at his house?

Cuz there wasn't much room.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gt0t
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2018
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What does a house wear to a party?

Address

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2018
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