A truck carrying toupees crashed on the highway, scattering its cargo

Police are combing the area

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πŸ‘€︎ u/frudedude
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11
🚨︎ report
News flash: A sewage truck exploded on the highway.

Many nearby were left with turd debris burns.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrSabrewulf
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17
🚨︎ report
I finally saw the new Justice League movie but when the heroes ended up in a funky little shack down the Atlanta highway, I was confused at first.

It was the Fred Schneider cut. Oops!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/logansworth
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20
🚨︎ report
I was wondering if I should go to work today, and then I saw some guys putting up a giant rectangle along the highway.

It was a sign.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/POCKALEELEE
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03
🚨︎ report
What do pirates say to warn when the California Highway Patrol is approaching?

Chips Ahoy.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Therapy_Gecko
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05
🚨︎ report
A truck of Vicks vapor rub crashed on the highway...

Luckily there was no traffic congestion...

Humbly submitted, Dad

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bradb717
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16
🚨︎ report
I didn't want to believe that my dad was stealing stuff from his highway maintenance job.

But when I got home, all the signs were there.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Turbulent-Use7253
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16
🚨︎ report
A cement mixer and a prison bus crashed on the highway...

Police advise citizens to be on the lookout for a group of hardened criminals!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/crazyfortaco
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2020
🚨︎ report
A group in Denmark is trying to convince the government to use old Legos to re-pave their highways...

...unfortunately, they've been running into a lot of road blocks.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KW-DadJoker
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2020
🚨︎ report
your mom secretly told me that you were born on a highway

....that's where most accidents happen

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2020
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What is an appropriate age to tell my highway it's adopted?

I feel like the 66 route is a little late

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πŸ‘€︎ u/WhiteWhenWrong
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2020
🚨︎ report
A truck overturned this morning spilling cabbage all over the highway.

It was horrific! I slaw it happen!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dogtarget
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Highway is full of Origami vehicles this evening...

Traffic is described as being stationery...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/trendfoll
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Which lane on the highway is the fastest?

The one you’re not in!

( written by my dad , late 90s)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LovingDatDee
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2020
🚨︎ report
I just got hired to work a booth on the highway.

They say this job really takes a toll

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πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2020
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I’m tired of spending money on highway booths during long drives.

It really takes its toll on me.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Highway disaster

My step son asked me if I was born on the highway because that’s where most accidents happen....he’s 11....

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πŸ‘€︎ u/milspec_monkey_12
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2020
🚨︎ report
A truck ahead of me spilled its load of cabbage all over the highway...

I never slaw it coming.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ Sep 06 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call tiny dead crustaceans on the highway?

Roadkrill.

(My eight-year-old came up with this one all on his own.)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jonheese
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2020
🚨︎ report
Cutting in front of a Volkswagen on the highway

more like en passat

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πŸ‘€︎ u/robotreader
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2020
🚨︎ report
TIL about the big pile ups on the Cretaceous highway.

They were tyrannosaurus wrecks.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/suamigojose
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2020
🚨︎ report
[On the highway] My wife: Hey, you missed a right!

Me: Thanks babe. You Mrs. Right!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Two dogs were walking down an empty highway. One of them stopped and defecated in the middle of the road.

When he was finished, he looked at the other dog and said, β€œClean up that mess.”

The other dog sniffed the pile and said, β€œNope. That’s your asphalt!”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pippingigi
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2020
🚨︎ report
HEADLINE: Vermont man arrested for throwing pickle from moving vehicle, striking a highway worker...

It wasn't a Vlasic case of road rage, but it's still Claussen quite a commotion.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the highway being built by the college in New Orleans?

It was Tulane

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πŸ‘€︎ u/spenpenn
πŸ“…︎ Jun 22 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the metaphysical highway sign say to warn drivers about wintry driving conditions?

Bridges may be, icy.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pippingigi
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2020
🚨︎ report
They're guaranteed to help you ketchup on the highway
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Thecrawsome
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2020
🚨︎ report
I'm not sure why the highway was arrested ...

... but I bet it was his own dumb asphalt.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/breakone9r
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2020
🚨︎ report
The police pulled up right next to me and my Yamaha on the shoulder of the highway today…

Apparently, it’s not the best place to play a keyboard…

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a sandwich that's eaten while driving on a highway?

Autobahn mi

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dancunn
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2020
🚨︎ report
A truck carrying Vicks vapor rub overturned on the highway.

Amazingly, there was no congestion for 8 hours.

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πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2020
🚨︎ report
I was driving on the highway and the wife said "You missed a right"

And I said "Thanks babe, and you're Mrs Right"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21 2020
🚨︎ report
A truck carrying toupees crashed on the highway, spilling everything.

Police are combing the area.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cdheer
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2019
🚨︎ report
I had a job clearing litter off the highways...

but I got laid off, even though the work was picking up.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/youtellmebob
πŸ“…︎ Jan 15 2020
🚨︎ report
[On the highway] Her: Hey, I think you missed a right.

Me: Thanks babe. You Mrs. Right!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2020
🚨︎ report
A truck full of donkeys passed me on the highway

He was really hauling ass.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/justryingtokeepup
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2019
🚨︎ report
A truckload of doorframe parts spilled out on the highway during rush hour...

It caused a big traffic jamb.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2019
🚨︎ report
The guy who paints the center line down the highway came into my deli for a quick bite...

He had to dine and dash.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2020
🚨︎ report
I don’t like driving on highways or bridges,

It really takes a toll.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VaiterZen
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2020
🚨︎ report
A large truck transporting wigs and toupees has crashed on a major highway sending its cargo everywhere.

Police are still combing the area.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Nightman_82
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2019
🚨︎ report
Highway to Heaven
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BanAllPineapples
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Mom: I hear that John's business is doing a lot better. How did he manage to get enough people to slow down on that stretch of highway to even notice his store? Dad: Oh, he followed my advice and put up a billboard.

"Nude Colony Ahead, Keep Your Eyes on the Road!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jan_Tik
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a California Highway Patrol Officer with a can of Skoal?

CHIPS and dip πŸ™Œ

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LiveNatty
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the truckload of pickles that overturned on the highway...

I dunno what the dill is... details are sketchy. I relish any comments with more info about this incident.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2019
🚨︎ report
A truck carrying toupees crashed on the highway,spilling everything

Police are combing the area

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Eisenhower_is_dad
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2019
🚨︎ report
My husband, toddler, and I are on a road trip. We turned on to the highway...

And directly facing the sun. I pulled down my visor down.

"Man," I said. "Just think, it's so bright in here I need to squint, even though the sun is 93 million miles away."

"What are you talking about?" my husband said. "He's right behind us."

groan

πŸ‘︎ 878
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SuurAlaOrolo
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2016
🚨︎ report

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