Tiny hawk
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2020
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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. . .

Nah, just kidding

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Leooof321dax
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2020
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I finally got around to reading that Stephen Hawking book!

It's about time!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheIndrajitKar
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2020
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What does Tony Hawk use to landscape his yard?

Face plants

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Foamy07
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2020
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What dating app does Tony hawk use?

Grindr

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shadyshdy
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2020
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Steven Hawking made lots of discoveries

He must have always been speechless

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dankpenguin69
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2020
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Stephen Hawking was from the UK

But if he was from the US, he would be Stephen YeeHawking

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AdventClobe
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2020
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Stephen hawking died on the most irrational day of the year
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LegendaryLordy
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2018
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A hawk landed on my head yesterday

It was perfect because I thought I needed some mohawk.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hlee89
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27 2020
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Dwayne "The Hawk" Johnson
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheShivanKing
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2019
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I told my son I was named after Stephen Hawking

Son: β€œBut dad, your name is John.”

Me: β€œI know, but I was named AFTER Stephen Hawking.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ATOMMANIPULATOR
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2019
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Stephen Hawk
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KingTutt2428
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2019
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What do you call a religious hawk?

A bird of pray

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nick3797
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2019
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My mom used to fly Black Hawks and Hueys.

I guess you could say she's a helicopter parent.

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2019
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Mike Rowe Waved
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ATacticalBagel
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2020
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One thing is for certain about the men who invented, built, and flew the world's first successful airplane at Kitty Hawk...

They were the Wright brothers for the job

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2019
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A once saw a hawk fall off a branch.

Boy, was that hawkward.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/labink
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2019
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Do you know how Stephen Hawking's kids used to refer to their mother's lover?

The walking dad

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sebicoroian
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2019
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If I ever lose my voice I want to have the Stephen Hawking voice modulator.

I’ve always wanted to speak intelligently.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Twigsnapper
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2019
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Stephen Hawking
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MollysYes
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2018
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What did the mouse say walking into a bar full of hawks

Haaaawkward!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheFullCircleK
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2019
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It took me forever, but I finally finished Steven Hawking’s book.

It’s about time.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 19 2018
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Had a Zoom call about whether or not to acquire a new bird of prey

It was an add hawk meeting.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/beyond_hate
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2020
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Despite his condition, Stephen Hawking figured out how to get erections again.

He disabled his pop-up blocker.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MelkorHimself
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2019
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I have the heart of a lion, the eyes of a hawk, the brains of a chimpanzee

Not to mention a lifetime ban from at least three zoos.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GGgetRekt
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2018
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What is it called when Einstein, Carl Sagan, and Stephen Hawking masturbate?

A stroke of genius.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cananbaum
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2017
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What's a bird's favourite sport?

Hawk-ey!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CupCakeJoe23
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2020
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Everyone thinks Jesus is great because he walked on water.

But Stephen Hawking ran on batteries.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FlickeryVisionnn
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2020
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What does a hawk call a high ledge?

A falcony!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/_potaTARDIS_
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2015
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My dad knows a hawk from a handsaw
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tonyvila
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2013
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Stephen Hawking is actually pretty funny..

But I don't think he could do standup.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/k-smackerel
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2015
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What are Stephen Hawking's favorite fruit?

Cherries.

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2015
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Three animals were having a huge argument over who was the best...

The first, a hawk, claimed that because of his ability to fly, he could attack anything repeatedly from above, and his prey stood nary a chance. The second, a lion, based his claim on his strength. None in the forest dared to challenge him. The third, a skunk, insisted he needed neither flight nor strength to frighten off any creature. As the trio debated the issue, an alligator came along and swallowed them all... hawk, lion and stinker.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2020
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Why does Stephen Hawking have difficulty speaking in public?

Maybe he's socially hawkward.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/atomic1fire
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2017
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Why is Stephen Hawking regarded as the smartest man ever?

He can never stand corrected.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/b0ner_Champ
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2016
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Tony Hawk's 900 really changed skateboarding...

I guess you could say it was revolutionary.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Foo_fight
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2015
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Did you hear Stephen Hawking is writing a new book on the 4th dimension?

It's about time!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Oddly_Specific
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2016
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Whats a hawks favorite sport?

Hawkey!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/I_didnt_fart
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2013
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Oh!
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dankmonseiur69
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2017
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I've been really keen on watching the SpaceX Falcon 9 rocket launches lately...

... Guess you could say that I've been watching them like a hawk!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/space0watch
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2020
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My wife noted an unusual number of hawks in the sky today.

I responded "maybe they're part of a hawk-y team!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tfofurn
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2015
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I finally got around to reading that Stephen hawking book.

It’s about time.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ghandee
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2020
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Sure, Jesus could walk on water...

But Stephen Hawking ran on Batteries

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Aloneexplorer
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2020
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