Oh My Gourd! I Made These Gift Card Holders!
πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MosswoodMama
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 15 2020
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Lucha-gourd
πŸ‘οΈŽ 13
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/amandabomb
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 20 2020
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What do you call several gourds related to each other?

Pump kin

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/JumpinJaccFlash
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 24 2020
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Gourd on Ram C
πŸ‘οΈŽ 36
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/AppropriateTomato
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 03 2020
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Gourd to know !
πŸ‘οΈŽ 285
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/mummy_ka_chappal
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 07 2019
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What do you call the leader of the gourds?

PUMPKING

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/sryIwashacked
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 17 2019
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Must've forgot my gourd again
πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jonnydoe345
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 13 2019
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Gourd on Ramsay
πŸ‘οΈŽ 13
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/The_Flamming_Tater
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 15 2019
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This afternoon I pulled two fat gourds from the same vine...

They were plumpkin

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/SiLifino
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 30 2018
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What do you call a person who identifies as a gourd?

A Pump-Kin!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/itsmoeyo
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 22 2018
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What do you call a gourd’s relatives?

Pump-kin.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Bigfoothobbit
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 16 2017
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90% of the pumpkins in the USA are raised within a ninety mile radius of Peoria, Illinois. That's gourd to know.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Ralph-Hinkley
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 17 2016
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What did the gourd say to the other gourd after running into each other?

Sorry for Pumpkin in to you!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Gari_23
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 05 2016
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Oh my gourd...

My wife was ringing up a purchase at a craft store where the customer had purchased many fake pumpkins and other assorted decorative fruits for fall. As the customer unloaded her cart, the gourds kept piling higher, and my wife exclaimed, "I'm feeling a bit squashed!"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/IBreakCellPhones
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 02 2014
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How to make a delicious pumpkin roll v.redd.it/3b8hzbg5vxs51
πŸ‘οΈŽ 86
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PigPopcorn
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 13 2020
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Squash the beef
πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RFSDQ
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 31 2020
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3 domesticated Rams are in the kitchen, labelled A, B & C

If you put a pumpkin on ram A, nothing happens. If you put a pumpkin on ram B you get the same result.

But if you put a pumpkin on Ram C it starts knocking things off counters, making a mess and abusing the kitchen staff.

I guess that is what happens when you put a gourd on ram c in the kitchen.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 28
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/kriskidd21
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 26 2020
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Slipped on a pumpkin today

It caught me off gourd

πŸ‘οΈŽ 18
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/hoteppeter
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 12 2020
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This time of year we switch out our old decorative squash for a new one -

It's the traditional changing of the gourd.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/justryingtokeepup
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 16 2020
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I used a pumpkin to summon ghosts.

It was a Ouija Gourd

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/pshiel23
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 29 2020
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Three sheep

A chef entered his kitchen one day struggling with holding onto a large pumpkin. He noticed three male sheep standing next to his oven. One of them had a collar on him with the letter β€œA” written on it. The second had a collar with β€œB” and the third had β€œC.” The chef didn’t know what to do with the sheep, and they were standing in front of the only place he could put the pumpkin down. He put the pumpkin on the first sheep’s head and nothing happened. He then put it on the second sheep’s head and again, nothing happened. He then put it on the third sheep’s head, and immediately the sheep started cooking a gourmet meal and swearing at anyone who passed by him.

That’s what happens when you put a gourd on ram C in the kitchen.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Pensrule2007
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 25 2020
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How does a vegetarian priest start their sermons?

Lettuce pray

πŸ‘οΈŽ 18
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/CjMcDonald85
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 09 2020
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My Uncle had an indoor pumpkin farm.

He had a real gourd complex.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Ska_For_Brains
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 01 2020
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What did one pumpkin say to the other?

You're looking pretty gourd today!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Gr1m_R33f3R
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 18 2020
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I had no idea my wife put a fake mustache on the squash

When I went to grab it, it caught me off gourd.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/oof_oofo
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 04 2020
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/pae913
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 05 2019
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Why did the melon get married?

He Cantaloupe

πŸ‘οΈŽ 14
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MemesRFunny2Me
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 18 2019
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To funny not to share
πŸ‘οΈŽ 2k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PachaFerrera
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 21 2017
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Did you know that the soldiers at Arlington salute their new Jack-o-Lanterns every Halloween?

They always honor the changing of the Gourd.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/bpmbrent
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 28 2020
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I work in security, and i want to get a pumpkin for my desk

It shall be a security gourd

πŸ‘οΈŽ 65
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Brad_Barracuda
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 17 2019
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Bedtime problems
πŸ‘οΈŽ 176
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/halfpeeledbanana
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 10 2018
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What is the prettiest pie?

A pumpkin pie, it’s Gourd-geous.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/EinarAsgeirsson
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 06 2019
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Vegetable Market
πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/happy_anand
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 08 2019
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What do you call a night watchman at a pumpkin patch?

Security Gourd

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/brassman1971
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 13 2019
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What does a lion, a giraffe, and an elephant wear to the beach? A...
πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/tale_of_tejon
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 26 2018
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I made a fiddle from a squash yesterday...

... i think it's broken, it only plays gourd vibrations.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/large__father
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 21 2019
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Did you hear about the pumpkin seeds that were drilled out, and then left alone with nothing to entertain them?

They were bored out of their gourd.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/nwhaught
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 29 2019
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Son: Dad, did you know they used to carve turnips on Halloween?

Dad: They must have been out of their gourds.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/naurugger
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 19 2019
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What do you call a group of zombie pumpkins?

A gourd.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MrMcFukmutty
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 06 2019
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What does a surprised pumpkin say?

OH MY GOURD!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/cakerzzzz
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 13 2019
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What do you call a barking pumpkin?

A gourd dog.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Mlnkoly111
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 02 2019
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What's a bug's most hated vegetable?

Squash.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 36
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PluvioBlue
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 24 2019
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What did the perverted pumpkin use for his pick-up line?

Hey gourd-geous! Wanna go back to my place and squash?

πŸ‘οΈŽ 22
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/grizzlyblur
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 26 2019
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My friend wanted me to take care of his extremely fragile pumpkin.

I told him I’d gourd it with my life.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 13
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/torchskul
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 02 2019
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Pumpkins are the most beautiful crop.

They're absolutely gourd-geous.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 40
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MelkorHimself
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 30 2018
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I'm not a dad but I take after him
πŸ‘οΈŽ 320
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/tpengz
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 17 2013
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A squash was killed this week.

Witness accounts say he was gourd to death.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/blacksheep26
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 08 2018
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What did the pumpkin say when it dropped its baby?

Oh my gourd!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 31
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TortoiseMan510
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 28 2018
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