Old but gold
π︎ 4k
π
︎ Apr 02 2021
Chemist n Plumber
π︎ 9k
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︎ Mar 28 2021
Gold peanuts
π︎ 47
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︎ Mar 24 2021
Old But Gold.
π︎ 15
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︎ Feb 24 2021
Discord chats sometimes have gold
π︎ 20
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︎ Mar 17 2021
My daughter told me nothing rhymes with orange. I told her sheβs wrong.
Nothing and orange have completely different ending sounds.
π︎ 1k
π
︎ Apr 17 2021
I pulled a muscle while digging up gold
π︎ 110
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︎ Feb 11 2021
Old Gold
π︎ 3k
π
︎ Oct 09 2020
What's the difference between Michelob ultra and pure gold?
One is a minor fined, the other is a miner's find.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Apr 02 2021
This is gold.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Mar 26 2021
What did the chemist say when he dropped a bar of gold on his foot?
π︎ 177
π
︎ Jan 14 2021
OP's post is for context but the comments are gold
π︎ 7
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︎ Feb 17 2021
I love GOLD , but *A* is silent in it!#chem punsΖͺ(Λβ£Λ)Κβ(β
ο½β)β
π︎ 14
π
︎ Dec 26 2020
Why did the non-binary prospectors head west?
Because there was gold in them/their hills
π︎ 784
π
︎ Apr 04 2021
Two goldfish are in a tank.
One says to the other, "do you know how to drive this thing?"
π︎ 2k
π
︎ Mar 14 2021
Why donβt chickens like to mine for gold?
They might find a nugget.
π︎ 14
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︎ Feb 17 2021
Gold walks into a bar
The bartender says "AU get out of here!"
π︎ 192
π
︎ Nov 06 2020
This is gold
π︎ 14
π
︎ Jan 09 2021
I couldnβt remember this guys name but knew it was Nate Gold-something.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Feb 12 2021
I just joined an online site for gold miner dating.
My first search for a mate brought no matches, but did give me plenty of prospects.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jan 24 2021
My friend Ty came first in the Beijing marathon, but wasnβt awarded a gold medal.
The Chinese refuse to acknowledge Ty won.
π︎ 13k
π
︎ May 19 2020
What do you call a dinosaur without gold?
π︎ 85
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︎ Nov 08 2020
No need for gold. I'm fine with silver(ware).
π︎ 36
π
︎ Nov 14 2020
How do gold fishes get old?
π︎ 10
π
︎ Dec 16 2020
My vaccine dad joke failed
π︎ 11k
π
︎ Jan 02 2021
"Thanks for the gold, kind stranger"
I said as I was taking away his dental implant.
π︎ 12
π
︎ Dec 18 2020
How does a non-binary samurai kill people?
π︎ 57
π
︎ Apr 01 2021
Why don't the Jedi take off their shirts to greet each other?
Because only a Sith deals in ab salutes.
π︎ 14k
π
︎ Dec 16 2020
Did you hear about the Chef that died?
He pasta way.
We cannoli do so much.
His legacy will become a pizza history.
He sadly ran out of thyme.
π︎ 45
π
︎ Mar 25 2021
i saw some joke about gold
π︎ 10
π
︎ Nov 17 2020
Before my surgery today, the anesthesiologist asked if I'd like to be knocked out with gas or he could just hit me over the head with a canoe paddle. So I guess it was...
...an ether/oar situation...
π︎ 10k
π
︎ Dec 28 2020
A youth soccer team that won gold at a tournament also stopped a thief that same day.
And he would have gotten away with it if it weren't for those medalling kids.
π︎ 16
π
︎ Dec 17 2020
The gold standard
π︎ 17
π
︎ Nov 02 2020
Adjective for metal is metallic
But not so for iron which is ironic
π︎ 172
π
︎ Feb 21 2021
Thereβs a sailor who is always finding foolβs gold
We call him the iron pirate.
π︎ 9
π
︎ Dec 16 2020
Since the very beginning, man has been panning for gold and using it as trade.
Our ancestors called it the prime-ore-deal soup
π︎ 2
π
︎ Dec 20 2020
A fog rolled in and turned my car into gold!
Must have been an alche-mist.
π︎ 22
π
︎ Nov 18 2020
I think about this way too much but I think it's comedy gold!
Mother in law to sister in law: why aren't you in pennsylvania this week
Me: because she's here at the table with us
π︎ 2
π
︎ Oct 27 2020
I asked my girlfriend if I could make her mine. "Yes! Oh, yes!" she shouted, eyes filling with tears. "Great!" I said.
"Now take this pick and go find me some gold!"
π︎ 94
π
︎ Mar 22 2021
A child was slightly injured while digging for gold
Not to worry, only Minor Miner Injuries
π︎ 9
π
︎ Sep 15 2020
I was kidnapped by mimes once
They did unspeakable things to me
π︎ 11k
π
︎ Oct 20 2020
How do you make holy water?
you boil the hell out of it
π︎ 46
π
︎ Mar 06 2021
I pulled a muscle while I was digging for gold.
π︎ 157
π
︎ Jan 15 2021
Why did the non-binary prospector head out West?
Because there was gold in them/their hills!
π︎ 9k
π
︎ Feb 02 2021
What did the chemist say when he dropped a bar of gold on his foot?
π︎ 50
π
︎ Oct 29 2020
I pulled a muscle swinging my pickaxe.
π︎ 135
π
︎ Feb 05 2021
I pulled a muscle digging for gold
π︎ 75
π
︎ Jul 16 2020
I pulled a muscle digging for gold
π︎ 63
π
︎ Jul 14 2020
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