Funny Liver Puns

So we're Swedish and this joke only works in Swedish (sorry). We went to buy some food, and the word liver has 2 meanings in Swedish ( lever - live and liver) So I said (pointing at the liver) Liver. He walk up to it and stares at it... And then he says nah looks pretty dead to me...

Sorry probably not so funny for you non sweeds..

Back story; the missus is vegetarian, I'm not. I check everything I buy her because you'd be surprised how many sweets contain cow and pig parts.

Me: "There's a new cake shop up the high street. It's supported by the vegetarian society. Here's a flier."

Her: "Oh. Nice. Do they deliver?"

Me: "no. No liver, only cake."

Her: "ha ha, you funny fuck."

And, yes; she actually SAID."ha ha"