I figure thistle be the best revenge!
if you haven't botany.
I replied, βso just a dollop of daisies?β
If you havenβt botany.
I said I'll tell you where you can plant your tulips.
Problem is she hasnβt botany.
I told them that they were still a few yards away.
Not quite as tragic, but it manifested into something which has haunted me at my job for years.
When I was a little kid learning about the world around me, my dad was naturally the font of all knowledge for me, He would answer all of little snippersmith's questions with his own unique insights and anecdotes teaching me of my surroundings with varying degrees of accuracy.
One day In a picture book, I encountered a photo of one of natures most bizarre creatures, the mighty duck billed platypus. Filled with curiosity of this bizarre creature and an Inability to read a young snippersmith asked his father what this creature was called, To which his father replied,
That's a Quackopotamous.....
As is a highly likely situation in day to day life the Platypus (or indeed the Quackopotamous), did not come into conversation for another 17 years, Until of course the Platypus came into conversation around the lunch table at a now grown up snippersmith's full time place of work.
I have not been allowed to forget I thought the Platypus was called a Quackopotamous, Indeed I am reminded on a daily basis by my colleagues, by my nickname Quackopotamous .
Thanks Dad.
EDIT 1: Holy Cow this took off! Gold! thank you so much.
Yard Art is strictly prohibited.
But i realized i hadn't botany
No hesitation I say, βTulipsβ
βSo, got any good mum jokes?β
Pollen happens when flowers can't keep it in their plants.
For example
Ben is in a hurry
vs
Ben is in a comma
So this is a bit long, sorry about that.
Zorro and his best bud the Lone Ranger were riding through the desert one day, I forget where they were heading to or where they had come from, but we can safely assume shenanigans of some kind were the driving force.
They have been travelling for most of the day and are starting to get tired. There has been a discussion about making camp for the night, but as things are they have agreed to continue riding for a while longer, till the sun starts to set. Away and off to the west the Lone Ranger spies a plant that seems to have large pink flowers that hang in strips with white stripes running the length of them.
"Zorro, what's that over there?" he asks.
Zorro turns in his saddle and raises his hand to shield his eyes from the sun. "Ah, it looks like a bacon tree, quite common in these parts. Let's ride on, there is a good place an hour from now to set up camp."
The two friends ride on and as the sun is beginning to descend the have stopped and are making camp. As Zorro begins to make a fire he says to the Lone Ranger, "You know, I quite fancy some pork. You ride back to that bacon tree and get some for supper, and I'll finish setting up camp here."
"No problem Zorro, I won't be long" replies the Ranger, jumping back into the saddle and returning the way they came.
Time passes, and the sun begins to get low in the sky. 'Odd', thinks Zorro 'he should be back by now.' Another hour passes and the shadows are growing longer. 'I might have to go investigate, it's not like him to take his time.' More time passes, and, just as Zorro has decided that he must go search for his friend in the dwindling light, he hears the sound of Silver's hooves. Looking into the gathering gloom he sees his friend riding towards him. As the Lone Ranger nears Zorro can see the Lone Ranger is injured, there are cuts and bruises and he has an arrow through his hat.
"What on earth happened, Lone Ranger? Did you make it to the Bacon tree?"
The Lone Ranger dismounts and sighs heavily.
"That weren't no Bacon tree, Zorro. That was an Hambush."
I told her "well you can't plant any flowers if you haven't botany"
So earlier, my boss put a plant on my desk with some flowers on the bottom and then a weird stick plant thing reaching out from the top. One of the guys as he headed out said, "Wow, nice plant."
Me: "I thought I would really try to reach my roots and branch out a bit. It seems to be working."
I bought flowers for my garden. They were obviously male flowers, but after they went into the ground, they were female.
I guess I trans-planted them correctly.
if you haven't botany.
if you haven't botany.
if you havenβt botany.
If you haven't botany.
Because she hasn't botany.
...if you havenβt botany.
If you haven't botany.
...if you havenβt botany
...if you havenβt botany.
You havenβt Botany
If you havenβt botany?
if you haven't botany
...if you havenβt Botany
They hadn't botany
If you haven't botany
if you havenβt botany
If you havenβt botany!!!!
I haven't botany
If you havenβt botany
If you haven't botany.
When the flowers can't keep it in their plants!
