My sarcastic teacher handed back my final exam..

I was told I was intelligen’t

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CakeRedditor
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2020
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For my final exam in piloting school, they had me fly a shipment of paint to its destination.

I passed with flying colors.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ToroZuzuX
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2019
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How is vodka different from a student taking their final exam?

Vodka has a guaranteed 40%

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ladamaster92
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2019
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A teacher is grading final exams. As soon as he grades the last paper, he starts sobbing. A student asks him what's wrong and the teacher says,

"I have failed all of you as a teacher."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ToroZuzuX
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2018
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My favorite college teacher, Professor Grey, had the most unforgettable final exams.

It was the Grey Test of all time.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2018
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A law student failed his final exam

β€˜Guess his examiner wasn’t having a bar of it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TARDIS40TT
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2018
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Got my brother after his final exam!

My Dad: What was the first exam?

Him: History.

Me: Would you say that you past?

Him: ΰ² _ΰ² 

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Imperious23
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2014
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Did you hear about the pilot who aced his final exams in college?

He winged it!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zxcv437
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2016
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Why did the roofing students miss their final exam?

They were too plastered.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spartacats
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2016
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Final exam dad joke

So dad asks how I did on my last final:

Me: I blew it out of the water!

And he interrupts me with this one:

Dad: I hope you didn't hold your breath the whole time!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/rosedaughter
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2014
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My uncle is an OG dad, schooling us all

Blatantly stolen from my Uncles Facebook page (link in comments):

Uncle: I'm proud of myself. Instead of goofing off this summer, I chose to go back to school and better myself. I enrolled in a course and have spent the past few weeks in intense study, finally passing the final exam today with a score of 100% - a score that I'm pretty sure they don't see too often. It's not often that I toot my own horn, but this time I think I really deserve it. Thank you to everyone who helped me achieve my goal!

Friend: Congratulations! What subject?

Uncle: It was Traffic School. Speeding ticket. The system wanted me to fail.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AlphaSquad1
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2019
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An unbridled masterpiece of a horse pun to one of my students this morning. It's a long setup, but dads will appreciate it. This one really happened as written.

So, I'm a Spanish professor, and I gave a final exam this morning. One of the last parts was that students had to write a paragraph using reflexive verbs in which they describe their daily routine. Since the class only had nine students in it, I told them that if they wanted to wait, I would grade their exams for them and tell them their class grade.

It was an open-book final exam (11 pages long), so I was in my office, and a graduating senior finished first and gave me her exam. When I got to her paragraph, I saw that she had written in Spanish that every day she woke up, got up, took a shower, got dressed, brushed her teeth, ate breakfast, and then she and her friend Emmy went horseback riding. Now, I knew that she didn't go horseback riding, ever, but that it was vocabulary from the previous chapter. The following conversation ensued:

Me: Horseback riding? Really?
Her: Yep!
Me: Every day?
Her: Yep!
Me: Every single day?
Her: SΓ­, SeΓ±or.
Me: I guess you could call it a stable routine then.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wuapinmon
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2018
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Friend got me

I was sitting in the library with my friend studying for finals. I have a night class tonight, but I have to study for a huge exam tomorrow. I said "So I've decided that I'm not going to my night class." My friend immediately says "Then how will you ever move past being a squire?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/krazykarl94
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2016
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"Feed your homework..."

I had to cook a meal for my family for my Home Ec Final Exam and we had 2 extra pieces of chicken left over. My dad said "Go feed your homework to the dogs"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Arfsmockle
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2013
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My ethics professor Dad-joked our class today

We just had a test on Immanuel Kant, and were starting a new philosopher today. My professor said:

"While we are done with Kant, we do have a final exam in this class. So there will be some continuity throughout the rest of the semester."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Brain13
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2014
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Hanging out in a public lounge in my residence hall when suddenly...

A good friend of mine walked in and told me that he had to study for an algorithms final exam in the morning.

I responded that I heard that class wasn't very difficult, isn't that just a class where former presidential candidate Al Gore shows up and lays down some beats for a few minutes?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fergmasterflash
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2014
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My new favourite Dad joke

An Aussie blonde was sent on her way to Heaven. Upon arrival, a concerned St Peter met her at the Pearly Gates. 'I'm sorry,' St Peter said; 'but Heaven is suffering from an overload of godly souls and we have been forced to put up an Entrance Exam for new arrivals to ease the burden of Heavenly Arrivals.'

'That's cool' said the blonde, 'What does the entrance exam consist of?'

'Just three questions' said St Peter.

'Which are?' asked the blonde.

'The first,' said St Peter, 'is, which two days of the week start with the letter 'T'? The second is 'How many seconds are there in a year'?

The third is 'What was the name of the swagman in Waltzing Matilda?''

'Now,' said St Peter, 'Go away and think about those questions and when I call upon you, I shall expect you to have those answers for me.'

So the blonde went away and gave those three questions some considerable thought (I expect you to do the same).

The following morning, St Peter called upon the blonde and asked if she had considered the questions, to which she replied, 'I have.'

'Well then,' said St Peter, 'Which two days of the week start with the letter T?'

The blonde said, 'Today and Tomorrow.'

St Peter pondered this answer for some time and decided that indeed the answer can be applied to the question.

'Well then, could I have your answer to the second of the three questions' St Peter went on, 'how many seconds in a year?' The blonde replied, 'Twelve!' 'Only twelve' exclaimed St Peter, 'How did you arrive at that figure?' 'Easy,' said the blonde, 'there's the second of January, the second of February, right through to the second of December, giving a total of twelve seconds.'

St Peter looked at the blonde and said, 'I need some time to consider your answer before I can give you a decision.' He walked away shaking his head.

A short time later, St Peter returned to the blonde. 'I'll allow the answer to stand, but you need to get the third and final question absolutely correct to be allowed into Heaven. Now, can you tell me the answer to the name of the swagman in Waltzing Matilda?'

The blonde replied: 'Of the three questions, I found this the easiest to answer.' 'Really!' exclaimed St Peter, 'and what is the answer?' 'It's Andy.' 'Andy??' 'Yes, Andy,' said the blonde. This totally floored St Peter and he paced this way and that, deliberating the answer. Finally, he could not stand the suspense any longer and turning to the blonde, asked 'How in God's name did you arrive at

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrTelly
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2014
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