Why was the skeleton sick?,_______________He Had A Femur
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👤︎ u/atenatjeayja
📅︎ Dec 03 2018
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Ah yes, pretty hip
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👤︎ u/entertainer011
📅︎ May 09 2021
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Q: Why was the church happy when the man lost his leg in an explosion?

A: Because he was a blast-femur.

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👤︎ u/ensgdt
📅︎ Feb 13 2021
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I said to my wife, "They say that childbirth is the most painful thing someone can experience..."

"Now, maybe I was too young to remember, but I didn't think it hurt that much."

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👤︎ u/madazzahatter
📅︎ Jul 12 2017
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What do you call a dream induced by a broken bone?

A femur dream.

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👤︎ u/egos_marvel
📅︎ Jan 08 2020
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(real story from work today)

At lunch my friend Tim was talking about how his son broke his femur, and this guy Chris immediately shrieked at the visual of it.

I said, "I give your reaction a 3 out of 5. That's my Yelp review."

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👤︎ u/JoeFas
📅︎ Nov 06 2019
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Did you hear about the skeleton who didn't go to church?

he was a blas-femur

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👤︎ u/Splaaaty
📅︎ Sep 01 2016
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What are the two most profane bones in the human body?

The blasfemurs

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👤︎ u/Rolling_Man
📅︎ May 21 2018
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What do you call a leg bone that won't stop hating on your gods?

A Blas-Femur

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👤︎ u/mopidozo
📅︎ Nov 19 2018
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My sister was in a pretty bad car accident a few years ago

Hit head-on by a drunk driver, she broke her right wrist and forearm (compound fracture), and broke her right femur. The doctor came to talk to us after the surgery and told us she was okay. My dad asked, "will she be able to play the trumpet?" And the doctor assured us that she would make a full recovery and be able to play after the cast came off. To which my dad replies, "Wow, you're one hell of a doctor. All she could play before was the piano!"

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👤︎ u/omaha_shanks
📅︎ Oct 02 2013
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