A list of puns related to "Fast Food Restaurants"
He leads the league in Arby eyes.
A Hamburglar
βItβs not heavy at all!β
To which I reply "That's okay, I will lose it eventually"
One was the fish friar, the other was the chip monk!
At a fast food restaurant, my dad's credit card gets rejected. Not missing a beat, he pulls out another one and says "Here, try this one, I just printed it up in my basement this morning."
Cashier: Could you take your top off?
My dad looking incredulous and holding himself somewhat defensively: I beg your pardon!
A Dad At Nearby Table: What is the difference between Dr. Pepper and Mr. Pibb?
(Silence)
Dad: A PhD!
/Good enough for popsicle sticks
A fast food restaurant chain of course!
I had an idea to start an Indian fast food restaurant. Iβd call it βHurry with the Curryβ.
Unfortunately, my wife said it was a naan-starter.
Dad: what's a Pirates favorite crime?
Me: uh ... ?
Dad: ARRRRson! What's a Pirates favorite type of socks?
Me: I don't know dad.
Dad: ARRRRgyle! What's a Pirates favorite branch of the military?
Me: rolling eyes it's the ARRRRmy.
Dad: acting confused No, it's the Navy. Why on earth would they like the army better?
Hopefully not a repost but I very clearly remember getting caught by this one and stuttering with no response.
Dad, did you get a haircut? No I got them all cut.
What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car? Carlos.
Dad, can you put my shoes on? No, I donβt think theyβll fit me.
Can I watch the TV? Dad: Yes, but donβt turn it on.
I would avoid the sushi if I was you. Itβs a little fishy.
What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.
You know, people say they pick their nose, but I feel like I was just born with mine.
βEvery time I hurt myself, even to this day, my dad says, βThe good news is..itβll feel better when it quits hurting.'β
Whatβs brown and sticky? A stick.
Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind itβs tearable.
Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere.
βIβll call you later!β- βPlease donβt do that. Iβve always asked you to call me Dad!β
Q: Why did the cookie cry? A: Because his father was a wafer so long!
What did the mountain climber name his son? Cliff.
This graveyard looks overcrowded. People must be dying to get in there.
βMy dad literally told me this one last week: βDid you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? They say he made a mint.ββ
βWhenever the cashier at the grocery store asks my dad if he would like the milk in a bag he replies, βNo, just leave it in the carton!ββ
I got so angry the other day when I couldnβt find my stress ball.
If I had a dime for every book Iβve ever read, Iβd say: βWow, thatβs coincidental.β
Iβm not indecisive. Unless you want me to be.
How many apples grow on a tree? All of them.
How does a penguin build itβs house? Igloos it together.
βMe: βDad, make me a sandwich!β Dad: βPoof, Youβre a sandwich!ββ
βI heard there was a new store called Moderation. They have everything there
A steak pun is a rare medium well done.
βHow can you tell if a ant is a boy or a girl? Theyβre all girls, otherwise theyβd be uncles.β
Milk is also the fastest liquid on earth β its pasteurized before you even see it
βWhatβs Forrest Gumpβs password? 1forrest1β
The only thing worse than having diarrhea is having to spell it.
I asked my friend to help me with a math problem. He said: βDonβt worry; this is a piece of cake.β I said: βNo, itβs a math problem.β
I keep trying to lose weight, but it keeps finding me.
I donβt play soccer because I enjoy the sport. Iβm just doing it for kicks.
Did I tell you the time I fell in love during a backflip? I was heels over head.
I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.
Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees?
... keep reading on reddit β‘I was at work today speaking with a few of my coworkers when we start talking about lunch. Two of my coworkers start talking about fast food restaurants they like going to when:
CW: I try not to eat fast food, but I really canβt help myself sometimes!
Me: I try to eat the slowest food possible, which is why I exclusively eat Tortoises.
CW: Well, all ofβ
It took them a couple seconds, but when they all looked at me with that βoh my gosh, you said what?β look, it made it all worth it.
Last week my wife fractured her tibia while we were on vacation. She is now in a boot up to her knee and confined to a wheelchair for a couple weeks as she can't put any weight on it.
Yesterday, we were having lunch at a fast food restaurant and she asked me to get her some ketchup. I looked right at her and said, "Why? Is your leg broken?"
I work as a manager at a fast food restaurant. Come closing time last night, one of my employees walks up to me and says "Hey, I'm going to fix some food before I leave, is that ok?"
"Fix some food? Who broke it?"
"What?"
"Well, if you're fixing it, somebody had to break it, right?"
She just groaned, rolled her eyes, and walked away.
What cold food do you order at a fast food restaurant?
A Brrrrrrger.
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