If you came here looking for an OP, you got it.
The lumberjack grinned and said: “And you will dialogue.”
Minneapolis?
I like Sony and Yamaha.
Dad: I just wanted to.... make my presents felt.
Actually it's probably more of a knight mare.
I told her it was an ovary action.
A pool table!
But I never get a straight answer.
Only a fraction of people understand that joke.
Because he conditioned it.
I said, “Are you having an existential cry, sis?”
I can also tell when they're standing.
EDIT: from https://jokeriot.com
"Greetings, comrade." says the spy, but before he could finish his sentence, the Russian says, "I think you are American spy."
The spy is alarmed, but being a skilled, trained, spy, he says, "That is not true! I am the proudest Soviet there is! I can sing the anthem more beautifully than any other man in the country!"
He then proceeds to sing the Soviet anthem, so melodically and beautifully, that everybody in the bar cheers.
"Very good, very good!" says the politician. "But I still think you are spy."
The man continues to keep his cool.
"I am a historian! I can tell you everything about this glorious country!"
He then spends about two hours recounting the Revolution, the Great Patriotic War, about how superior to the Russia is in terms of technology compared to America and makes a great argument about how communism is beneficial to society.
"Amazing! You are skilled!" says the politician.
The spy smirks.
"But I still think you American spy."
The spy is getting frustrated, but still unfazed.
He replies, "I am good drinker, a true Russian! Let us drink, and see who can come out top!"
The bar turns its attention to the politician and the spy, who are now in a drinking contest.
The bartender serves drink after drink of vodka.
After about an hour of drinking, the politician nearly passes out, unable to hold as much liquor as the spy, to a resounding cheer amongst the bar.
In the midst of the cheering, the Russian politician gets up, smiling, and in a slurred speech, repeats, "You are good, you are good... but I still think you are spy."
The American spy, piss drunk, loses his skill and gives up.
"Okay, you got me. I am an American. But what made you think that way, after all this time?"
The Russian politician replies, "There aren't many black people in Russia."
Well, he sure doesn't want to be spotted
I guess you can say the baby was airborne
Edit: Sorry if the joke is terrible, I just made it up.
Because it's about to die from dissin' Terry.
Dad: William.
Student: “Hey can you check this to see if it’s right?”
Student hands me their writing.
Me, holding their paper upside down: “well, first of all, it’s written upside down.”
And then I give it back to them and walk away as if nothing happened.
Because, from a distance, they'll look like hares.
.. then Soviet!
To remember to write music, he had to write himself a note.
He got so ill he fell into a korma!
I calm myself down by playing my Christ Box 360.
The bartender says, “Wow! That’s a different order of magnitude.”
Because they were looking for pi.
Ok I know this is bad but shut up
Because he is the supreme reader
Because I found Himalayan on the road.
A trophy
Damn autocorrect
None...They almost all usually use gas or diesel.
They were cooked in Greece.
Does it make a sound?
To get to the other sides.
"Urgh, If this was any weaker... it'd be a fortnight"
(Looks around for approval from the family)
To the dock.
Heard it this morning on the Irish classic fm. Loved it!
With a magnet.
White water rafting.
A chicken has two drumsticks.
Arigatoni.
Working on a little something. Give me your best and I will include you in the credits.
So far I only have: Coo Skywalker
Edit: thanks for all the replies! I will post game here soon, and pm those whose puns I end up using.
It was due to the bounty on his head
He's got flans within flans.
What, it's still going on?
Isn't Wimble-done yet??
Killed 250 bobs.
turns out i couldn't stick to it
The bartender says, "How'd you do that?"
