Some aquatic mammals at the zoo escaped. It was otter chaos.
Yesterday, a big cat escaped from the nearby zoo
Trust me, I ain't lion.
I'd puma pants if I found it...
Why don't escaped convicts make good writers?
Because they never finish their sentences
How did the maniac escape the asylum?
So an escaped prisoner was caught camping out in the woods..
It was a clear case of criminal in tent.
A fish escaped from prison the other day.
Don’t worry though, they cod him.
Lost my job at the keyboard factory yesterday
I wasn't putting in enough shifts apparently
The other day I escaped from a honey bee prison, but I had an allergic reaction.
A psychic dwarf escaped from prison.
The police imidiately put out an A.P.B. There is a small medium at large.
A German guy went on a vacation to Miami to escape the German bitterly cold atmosphere. On his first day of the trip, he headed to the beach and had some mai tais.
Unfortunately, he has a low alcohol tolerance, so it did not take him long to be drunk.
He felt a strong urge to pee, and in his drunken state, decided to answer nature's call right on the sand.
Then, out of nowhere comes a lady, also a tourist. She was frightened and shrieked: "Gross!"
"Danke."
All my chicken jokes escaped this morning…
What did the bounty hunter say after the soap escaped again?
How do you escape from a fictional prison?
You break the fourth wall.
(I kind of doubt I'm the first person to come up with this joke, but since I haven't come across it before I'll consider it OC until proven wrong)
This is the point of no return
How did the hackers escape the police?
If, whilst having my tea, I knock a pea off my plate onto the table or floor, I announce to my family - "I have an escape-pea."
Two caterpillars are escaping a spider. They climb up a branch and get to the edge, but realize they are now trapped…
"Hold on tight!" says the first caterpillar and he quickly chews through the branch.
It snaps and they begin to fall, but he grabs two protruding twigs and uses them to steer the branch through the air with grace and finesse.
"That's amazing!!" says the second caterpillar. "How in the hell are you doing that?!"
The first caterpillar scoffs.
"Am I the only one in the whole damn forest who knows how to drive a stick!?"
A notorious bank robber and killer Artie hits a town bank on his travels. But the bank was emptied the night before. As Artie got more and more frustrated he strangled 3 of the staff before escaping with only a single Dollar Note.
Newspapers report Artie Chokes three for a dollar!
How did the inventor of computer viruses escape?
I broke into a sheep farm, but had to escape on one of the animals, when the cops showed up.
At the moment, I am still on the lamb.
Choosing between a fire escape or a crowded elevator is not an easy decision.
Do you want stairs or stares?
Did you hear about the guy who stole from the Asian market and made a slow escape?
A prisoner spent a month digging an escape tunnel and finally came out in the playground of a preschool.
He jumped around with excitement yelling "I'm free, I'm free". A small girl looked up at him and said, "Big bloody deal, I'm four".
This just in: Donkeys escaped from the Bronx zoo
NYPD is setting up a perimeter around all 5 burros
what does a person from Qatar use to kill a bird
A bear almost attacked me, but I escaped
If you don't think there will be a sequel to John Carpenter's best movie
You've got another thing coming.
I just got hit by a can of soda!
But I think I’m okay, it was a soft drink
How did the hacker escape from the FBI
A sheep farmer escaped from jail...
What do you call a psychic dwarf who has escaped from prison?
what do you call a psychic dwarf who escaped prison?
Q: How did the hackers escape from the police?
What do you call a dwarf psychic who just escaped from prison?
Did you hear about the psychic dwarf who escaped prison?
He was a small medium at large
What do you call a psychic dwarf that has escaped from prison?
Did you hear about the psychic dwarf who escaped from prison?
The headlines read, Small Medium at Large.
did you hear about the psychic my midget that escaped from prison?
He's a short medium at large
Some aquatic mammals at the zoo escaped.
Did you hear the one about the dwarf psychic who'd escaped from prison?
He was a small medium at large
Some aquatic mammals at the zoo escaped.
What do you call a midget psychic that just escaped from prison?
How did the hackers escape?
How did the hacker escape the police?
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