A football player goes to the doctor and says "It hurts whenever I touch my face, knee and elbow." The doctor says,

"You've broken your hand."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/timthedriller
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2020
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Did you hear the one about the guy that hit his elbow?

I think it’s quite humerus

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Theworldburns
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2021
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Today my wife accidentally pushed flower pot with her elbow. After 3 hours of arguingshe came to a conclusion that

I put it in the wrong place...... 3 years ago

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πŸ‘€︎ u/newdoc123
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2020
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Why can't you give credit to elbow for bending the arm?

Because it's a Joint effort

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dadushka008
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2020
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What do you call the man who lives without technology and got amputated to the elbows?

Armish.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AXLISMYGOD
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2020
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I bumped my elbow digging for gold.

It was a miner injury.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spotter66
πŸ“…︎ Jun 18 2019
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It has always been his Achilles’ elbow.
πŸ‘︎ 97
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2018
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I know a guy who had both arms amputated from elbow to shoulder.

He is always serious and never humerus...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2019
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1:Why is your elbow so boney?2: because it is

El Bone

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πŸ‘€︎ u/snake_with_hat_
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2019
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Elbow macaroni, anyone?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DaddyMayIPun
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2018
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I hit my elbow on a propane tank at work today

I can see why it's not called protickle

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dejaentendood
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2018
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If Elbows Didn't Bend...

They would have no point.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BitbyDeadBear
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2018
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What did the elbow say to the waist when it did something cool?

That’s hip.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/goatymacgoatface
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2018
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What do you call a woman with one beer on her head and one on each elbow, playing snooker

Beertricks potter

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Wpallister123
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2018
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My dad had to go home because he was "elbow deep" in ants. imgur.com/jt5dJFp
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VVTF_iz_Wright
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2013
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My poor knowledge about Greek mythology has always been my Achilles' elbow.
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πŸ“…︎ Oct 26 2015
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When I was a kid my sister shattered her elbow and was taken to the hospital.

When my dad arrived, he said "this is for if you ever need a new one" and gave her a box of elbow macaroni noodles.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SpehlingAirer
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2016
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I broke my arm just above the elbow.

When I went in to have it fixed, they said they would have to put me under. I woke up with the doctor looking at me with a very concerned and somewhat guilty look on his face. "It seems I have operated on the wrong part," he said. I looked down and my knee was all bandaged up. All I could mutter was "This is not humerus."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/YoureAMuenster
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2017
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Texted dad to let him know that I picked up the pipe elbow needed for the pool.

Me: I think I have your elbow. Dad: I thought I felt someone grab me.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/angelicmckayla
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2015
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asshole/elbow

My wife called me an asshole , I called her an elbow. She laughed and said,"That's dumb!". I looked her in the eye and said, "I can get along without an elbow, a hell of a lot better than you can without, an asshole". She smiled - that's all a man needs, I love that woman.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kram12345
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2015
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