Took my son fishing yesterday and there was a dolphin. When I cast out my bait he asked "are you trying to catch him?"

Me; "Not on porpoise"

He laughed 12 year old girl next to us cringed and said "porpoise... really?" Joke had desired effect.

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📅︎ Aug 11 2019
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Evolution is so strange. Dolphins started off as sea creatures, then evolved to have legs, only to eventually return to the sea and lose them.

Kinda defeets the porpoise, don't you think?

👍︎ 6k
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📅︎ Sep 15 2019
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Dad joked a fishy customer and got dad joked in return.

I work in sales and a man with the last name 'Salmon' ordered some goods from us, his Credit Card payment wasn't passing our credit rating. He asked me for some help and I said 'I dolphinately haven't seen anything this fishy in a whale'

He chuckled to himself and asked me 'Did you just make a fish pun on porpoise?'

Who know there were so many dad's out there!

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📅︎ Mar 27 2014
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How would bottle-nosed dolphins smell if you cut their nose off?

Q : How would bottle-nosed dolphins smell if you cut their nose off? A : Still the same - just like fish.

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👤︎ u/g-mode
📅︎ Aug 27 2016
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Dolpins getting high

I was telling my dad how dolphins get high by chewing on puffer fish toxins and all he could say was "How else would they get high, they can't light and smoke it"

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📅︎ Dec 31 2013
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