A list of puns related to "Detectives"
They weren't just chasing a serial killer, they were chasing a mass murderer
No shit Sherlock?
An investi-gator.
The first guy answers, "That's easy, we'll catch him fast because he only has one eye!"
The policeman says, "Well...uh...that's because the picture I showed is his side profile."
Slightly flustered by this ridiculous response, he flashes the picture for 5 seconds at the second guy and asks him, "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?"
The second guy smiles, flips his hair and says, "Ha! He'd be too easy to catch because he only has one ear!"
The policeman angrily responds, "What's the matter with you two?!!? Of course only one eye and one ear are showing because it's a picture of his side profile! Is that the best answer you can come up with?"
Extremely frustrated at this point, he shows the picture to the third guy and in a very testy voice asks, "This is your suspect, how would you recognize him?
He quickly adds, "Think hard before giving me a stupid answer."
The third guy looks at the picture intently for a moment and says, "The suspect wears contact lenses."
The policeman is surprised and speechless because he really doesn't know himself if the suspect wears contacts or not.
"Well, that's an interesting answer. Wait here for a few minutes while I check his file and I'll get back to you on that."
He leaves the room and goes to his office, checks the suspect's file on his computer and comes back with a beaming smile on his face.
"Wow! I can't believe it. It's TRUE! The suspect does, in fact, wear contact lenses. Good work! How were you able to make such an astute observation?"
"That's easy..." the third guy replied. "He can't wear regular glasses because he only has one eye and one ear."
It was a brief case.
An investigator
Sherlock Homeless
Scooby Dubai Do
Star Key and Hash.
Sherlock Stockholmes
Sir lock homes
No shit, Sherlock.
Go undercover.
I told him kindergarten
He said it was an open and shut case.
He left a trail of deduction in his wake
After spending a few days at a detective convention, they come home to find their house burned to the ground. "What do you think caused this?" One asked the other. The other just sighed and replied "It was most likely ourson (arson)."
"Good idea!" I replied. "We can cover more ground that way!"
Turns out it was just a bread herring.
Because the real killer is usually cyan-eyed.
He was charged with helping the criminal get a weigh.
Sherlock Ohms
We call him Sherlock Ohms.
He found his locomotive.
βIβm never going to get to the bottom of this.β
They were called βthe clue clucks clanβ
11.45 : arrived at crime scene
11.45 : Examined body. Signs of struggle
11.45 : Found murder weapon in drain
11.45 : Realised watch was broken
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My son: but this is not a dad joke.
Me : what is a day joke then?
My son : when the joke becomes a(p)parent.
He hasnβt got a clue.
It was a briefcase
Watson (constipated): "No shit, Sherlock."
The Mac cleu cleus clan
They are always looking for more proof!
His teammate is an anthropomorphic pig who wore a hood like little red riding hood. The pigβs name was Boar-Hood. So this one time, I wanted them to check out a masked menace in New York City. Fred wanted to lead the investigation. But since the criminalβs mask was animal themed, I said to them, βFred Lee: nay. Boar-hood: spy the manβ
"This concludes my probaballistic report."
The children all lived in a nearby apartment complex. The younger siblings lived in apartment 8D and the older ones lived in apartment 9D. Detective Johnson advised Detective Smith that she probably shouldnβt bother question 8Dβs children about what they saw, since theyβre too young to have a reliable memory. He believed that Smith would have a better chance of getting good information from the older children, since only 9Dβs kids will remember.
Concrete evidence.
A defective!
They always quack the case.
An Investa-gator
An INVESTIGATOR
An investigator
It was a brief case.
An investi-gator
It was a brief case.
It was a brief case.
It was a brief case.
No shit Sherlock
No shit Sherlock
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