Critiquer Puns

We're sitting around having dinner, and my wife isn't feeling great about the cooking. My daughter (6) starts critiquing the sauce, talking about what she doesn't like. I told her that sometime you have to read the room and see whether people want their cooking criticized.

She looks at me and says "Dad, you can't read a room if there are no letters in it" and starts giggling.

It’s an untapped market.

My dad caught me fapping for my first time.

He critiqued my method , but I said that I was just a newcomer.

And when my girlfriend showed her piece, he scolded and critiqued her...In defense of my girlfriend I quickly shouted, "Hey, that's where I draw the line! You need to easel up on my girlfriend!"

He wasn't amused.

I got some fish and chips and a deep fried mars bar with my girlfriend and afterwards she was critiquing the deep fried mars bar.

Girlfriend: It was pretty good, but the batter was too thick. There was too much before you got to the melted mars bar

Me: So...you're saying that it could have been batter?

I didn't look at her, but I could tell she was glaring at me