I was critical of my cardiologist
I didn't know he would take it to heart
THIS JUST IN: A man is still in critical condition after swallowing $100,000 in large bills.
We had a critical issue at work today, the icons on the monitor screen were small
It took us a while to work out a proper resolution
The comments on the post of a video where a man who flew from Emirates (using hot air balloons) and was found in Oman in a critical condition. I doubt if that video Israel..
The comments on the post of a video where a man who flew from Emirates (using hot air balloons) and was found in Oman in a critical condition. I doubt if that video Israel..
The police called me to tell me my wife was in hospital and that she was critical !
What is she complaining about now I said
Probiotics are a critical part of your diet
The health of your digestive system is too important to leave up to amateur biotics
Breaking bad was just another critical meth movement.
Scientist Found a Critical Flaw in General Relativity
It has since been demoted to a lieutenant.
I rolled a critical hit on my dad joke last night
Wife is sitting on the couch, couple friends are over to plan our upcoming D&D campaign. One friend, named Joe, is rolling stats and getting mediocre results.
I lean over, stare hard at my wife, and say, "Looks like he's just an average Joe..."
My wife always criticizes me for wearing mittens instead of gloves in the winter.
But I don’t like to point fingers.
How does a food critic keep their identity a secret?
They use a Nom Nom Nom de Plum
My partner was always criticising my sense of direction...
Never criticize someone until you’ve walked a mile in their shoes.
That way you are a mile away and you have their shoes.
Do you know what happened to Jack Ma after he criticized the Chinese Government?
What does a critic say at a funeral?
Did you hear about the runner who was criticized?
He just took it in stride
Never criticize your wife’s judgements,
Remember who she married?
While I was gardening a potato was watching me and criticizing my every move. He thought he was big stuff.
But I think he was just a commontater
What did Beethoven do when he got bad criticism?
He turned a deaf ear to them.
You can always give punk rock bands constructive criticism...
They appreciate feedback.
The Final Catholic Service
The Final Catholic religious service right before the world is destroyed will be held in an ICBM silo.
They'll have Critical Mass.
Last night, I got fed up at my wife criticizing my sense of direction.
So I packed my bags and right.
what do you called a website that talked about reading, and also criticized a lot.
What do you call an insane critic?
Swedish inventors have created cyborgs which are hard to distinguish from real humans.
Critics are concerned about the use of artificial Swedeners.
What did book critics think of the Communist Manifesto?
They gave it high Marx because it looked at many new Engels.
I saw the headline “Trump Attacks WHO chief Over Criticisms of U.S. Approach to Coronavirus” and thought...
What the hell did Pete Townshend do?!?
The hungry hungry hippos always have something to say when other hippos eat as much as they do
They're very hippo critical
Never criticize your wife’s decisions...
Because you were one of them!
I had a newly created job as Corporate Critic...
where I could criticize and demean other employees. But the job was eliminated and I was let go when my co-workers complained about my DISS-POSITION.
In China, you can criticize every Roman numeral from I to X.
But you can't criticize XI.
The art critic had to see a podiatrist.
He was diagnosed with aesthetes foot. (OC)
I don’t know why my wife criticized me for not stretching after exercising.
She knew I was already knotted up about it.
A condom manufacturer kept getting criticized because its new gimmicks never did anything for women. So they did what any good company would do and went to the most knowledgeable frog in the world for advice. You know what the frog said?
Critic
A struggling artist gets his first painting in to an art gallery. An art critic approaches him:
“Would you like to hear my professional opinion on your painting?”
“Sure.”
“It's pretty much worthless.”
“I don't mind, you can tell me anyway.”
Did you know the first French Fries weren’t cooked in France?
They were actually cooked in Greece
What do you call a boat that doesn't allow criticism?
My daughter just hit me with this over dinner.
We're sitting around having dinner, and my wife isn't feeling great about the cooking. My daughter (6) starts critiquing the sauce, talking about what she doesn't like. I told her that sometime you have to read the room and see whether people want their cooking criticized.
She looks at me and says "Dad, you can't read a room if there are no letters in it" and starts giggling.
A movie about Janitors impressed critics.
Later that year the movie swept the Oscars.
At the zoo there is a famous hippopotamus critic they named Al. There is only one problem.
A man is still in critical condition after swallowing $250,000 in large bills
Before criticizing someone, walk a mile in their shoes.
That way, when you criticize them, you are a mile away and have their shoes.
Did you hear about the runner who was criticized?
He just took it in stride
Did you hear about the runner who was criticized?
He just took it in stride
Did you hear about the runner who was criticized?
He just took it in stride
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