A band named 1023 MB was very sad, they couldn't get a gig.
This is unoriginal, but it has been reposted so many times i can't even pund it anywhere in the web, I even asked my pet spider where it was orginally found.
Pun 1: >!A gigabyte is actually 1024 MB not 1000 MB!<
Pun 2: >!Spiders makes webs idiot.!<
Why don’t Vikings like to send emails?
They prefer to use Norse code!
more dad style computer jokes at https://puns.dev
How do two programmers make money? One writes viruses, the other anti-viruses.
Where’s the best place to hide a body? Page two of Google.
A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history – with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila.
If it weren’t for C, we’d all be programming in BASI and OBOL.
There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don’t.
In a world without fences and walls, who needs Gates and Windows?
Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.
Never underestimate the bandwidth of a station wagon full of tapes hurling down the highway.
An SQL statement walks into a bar and sees two tables. It approaches, and asks “may I join you?”
Why is it that programmers always confuse Halloween with Christmas?
Because 31 OCT = 25 DEC.
Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft… and the only one that can be mass produced with unskilled labor.
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? None. It’s a hardware problem.
I named my hard drive “dat ass” so once a month my computer asks if I want to ‘back dat ass up’.
I think my neighbor is stalking me as she’s been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
I changed my password to “incorrect”. So whenever I forget what it is the computer will say “Your password is incorrect”.
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
It’s ok computer, I go to sleep after 20 minutes of inactivity too.
Entered what I ate today into my new fitness app and it just sent an ambulance to my house.
A clean house is the sign of a broken computer.
Wifi went down during family dinner tonight. One kid started talking and I didn’t know who he was.
I would like to thank everybody that stuck by my side for those five long minutes my house didn’t have internet.
A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.
Are you a computer whiz? it seems you know how to turn my software to hardwar
... keep reading on reddit ➡for a tech class, i need a team name. I want a punny one. Any suggestions?
Edit: thanks so much!
It was an Apple with limited memory; just one byte. Then, everything crashed.
Boss: Hard drive?
Me: No, the commute was fine. It’s my laptop.
I’m not too worried, I think she’s jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf
They just log in. My 7yr old daughter just told me this, so proud!
They just ransomware.
Not sure !! But when it megabytes, it megahertz.
He especially liked logging in.
To the space bar !!
Need all the other computers in the house have slowed down so they can see what happened.
Computer: password cannot contain symbols
To improve their web-sight
I guess, I've got to start again from scratch.
They're calling it the Big Mac
But this one day, the computer wouldn't stop talking, so I went out and got a Zip drive.
It had Windows
Doc says it’s terminal.
I guess you could say I have Surface tension.
Adele
It was a hard drive
I guess she doesn’t like windows.
One is a rack of lamb, the other is a lack of RAM.
It forgot to close its windows.
>!A Big Mac 🤓!<
A ChampionChip
I should stop using WebMD as my homepage.
It had a chip on its shoulder.
So I deleted the anti-virus and there weren't any problems any more!
He was pissed that he couldn’t log-in
Data
His windows was cracked.
It was an Apple with very limited memory. Just 1 byte and everything crashed!
Data
It was an Apple, but with extremely limited memory. Just one byte. And then everything crashed.
Edits: Thanks for all the awards!
I think they just ransomware.
...but I think she's jokinfjreoiwjrtwe4to8rkljreun8f4ny84c8y4t58lym4wthylmhawt4mylt4amlathnatyn
