What works faster than a calculator?
      
      
        π︎ 9k
         
        
        
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︎ Dec 30 2020
        
       
      
     
      My calculator only has enough power left to do one calculation
      I really have to make it count
 
      
        π︎ 4k
         
        
        
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︎ Jan 01 2021
        
       
      
     
      What do you call a calculator that works instantly?
      
      
        π︎ 13k
         
        
        
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︎ Nov 01 2020
        
       
      
     
      Whenever I am in doubt, I resort to using my calculator.
      I can always count on it.
 
      
        π︎ 4
         
        
        
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︎ Jan 03 2021
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      Playing rainbow six using Calculator as a controller
      
      
        π︎ 4k
         
        
        
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︎ Aug 22 2020
        
       
      
     
      I donβt understand why my calculator just stopped working.
      It just doesnβt add up.
 
      
        π︎ 18
         
        
        
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︎ Oct 28 2020
        
       
      
     
      When people think of calculators they think the buttons are the most important thing
      But it's what's inside that counts
 
      
        π︎ 12k
         
        
        
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︎ Apr 23 2020
        
       
      
     
      Ive checked and checked and i just cant work out why my calculator has stopped working!!!
      It just doesnβt add up.
 
      
        π︎ 9
         
        
        
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︎ Nov 16 2020
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      Ah yes the calculator
      
      
        π︎ 35
         
        
        
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︎ Sep 02 2020
        
       
      
     
      My calculator is missing the minus button....
      But on the plus side it still works.
 
      
        π︎ 227
         
        
        
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︎ Jan 26 2020
        
       
      
     
      A boy breaks his calculator just before a big math test
      From the shelf beside him, an abacus says "Dont worry kid, you can always count on me"
 
      
        π︎ 19
         
        
        
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︎ Jul 10 2020
        
       
      
     
      When I was young, I once asked my dad for a pocket calculator, but he said no.
      He said, βWho cares how many pockets you have?β
 
      
        π︎ 44
         
        
        
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︎ May 19 2020
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      The TSA detained a passenger in possession of a slide rule, compass and calculator...
      They said he was carrying weapons of math instruction, and was a member of the Alge-bra movement.
 
      
        π︎ 4
         
        
        
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︎ May 22 2020
        
       
      
     
      Just wondering, if you push the buttons on a calculator really fast ...
      ... does it become a calcu-earlier?
 
      
        π︎ 7
         
        
        
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︎ Apr 16 2020
        
       
      
     
      Girlfriend got mad when I gave her a box full of ants with calculators for valentines day
      Don't understand why, she'd always told me it's little things that count?
 
      
        π︎ 15
         
        
        
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︎ Feb 22 2020
        
       
      
     
      Where does the evil calculator go when he dies?
      
      
        π︎ 31
         
        
        
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︎ Dec 02 2019
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      I got a really ugly looking calculator for Christmas.
      But it is what is on the inside that counts.
 
      
        π︎ 675
         
        
        
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︎ Dec 18 2018
        
       
      
     
      I handed my dad a calculator for his birthday. with a dissapointed scowl on his face, he asked me...
      
      
        π︎ 5
         
        
        
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︎ Nov 18 2019
        
       
      
     
      Everyone is so surprised after getting hit by a calculator...
      ... I guess they weren't counting on it
 
      
        π︎ 315
         
        
        
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︎ Aug 06 2018
        
       
      
     
      Why did the protractor marry the calculator?
      It was a math made in heaven.
 
      
        π︎ 7
         
        
        
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︎ Oct 08 2019
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      I gave my son a calculator named βThoughtβ.
      Itβs the thought that counts.
 
      
        π︎ 18
         
        
        
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︎ May 16 2019
        
       
      
     
      I might buy you an exploding calculator...
      
      
        π︎ 22
         
        
        
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︎ Aug 02 2019
        
       
      
     
      I found a box of discarded calculators and I just had to rescue them because...
      
      
        π︎ 46
         
        
        
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︎ May 07 2019
        
       
      
     
      Why did I get a tattoo of a calculator?
      So you can always count on me.
 
      
        π︎ 91
         
        
        
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︎ Oct 16 2018
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      I'm trying to work out a complicated maths equation with a broken calculator
      But itβs only adding to the problem
 
      
        π︎ 21
         
        
        
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︎ Jul 01 2019
        
       
      
     
      I don't know why people carry pocket calculators
      I can tell how many pockets I have without one.
 
      
        π︎ 19
         
        
        
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︎ Dec 23 2018
        
       
      
     
      My best friend ia a calculator...
      Iβve always been able to count on him.
Is* in the title.
 
      
        π︎ 3
         
        
        
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︎ Jun 09 2019
        
       
      
     
      My son said his calculator wasn't working earlier in the day but it works now.
      I said it was because it was a calcu-later.
 
      
        π︎ 33
         
        
        
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︎ May 05 2018
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      My calculator broke today,
      
      
        π︎ 4
         
        
        
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︎ Jun 03 2019
        
       
      
     
      I think the Calculator is behind the murder of my mother
      
      
        π︎ 38
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jan 26 2019
        
       
      
     
      This old calculator might not look like much...
      But it's what's inside that counts.
 
      
        π︎ 8
         
        
        
        π
︎ Mar 03 2019
        
       
      
     
      I took out my calculator and the plus button was missing.
      Something doesnβt quite add up.
 
      
        π︎ 27
         
        
        
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︎ May 01 2018
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      Trust your calculator
      It's something you can count on.
 
      
        π︎ 39
         
        
        
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︎ Mar 28 2018
        
       
      
     
      Trust your calculator.
      It's something to count on.
You can count on it.
Edit: 30% more dad added to joke. Thank you u/next2nothing_
 
      
        π︎ 43
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jan 30 2017
        
       
      
     
      What works faster than a calculator?
      
      
        π︎ 14
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jan 07 2021
        
       
      
     
      I canβt understand why my calculator just stopped working
      
      
        π︎ 56
         
        
        
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︎ Oct 18 2020
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      I can't understand why my calculator just stopped working
      
      
        π︎ 30
         
        
        
        π
︎ Oct 19 2020
        
       
      
     
      What do you call a calculator that works instantly?
      
      
        π︎ 6
         
        
        
        π
︎ Nov 17 2020
        
       
      
     
      I canβt understand why my calculator wont work.
      It just doesnβt add up.
 
      
        π︎ 6
         
        
        
        π
︎ Oct 18 2020
        
       
      
     
      I asked my dad if he could buy me a pocket calculator.
      He said, βWhy? You donβt know how many pockets you have?β
 
      
        π︎ 16
         
        
        
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︎ Mar 29 2020
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      Why are calculators so dependable?
      Because you can always count on them
 
      
        π︎ 15
         
        
        
        π
︎ Nov 03 2019
        
       
      
     
      Weird how my calculator has stopped working...
      
      
        π︎ 18
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jun 24 2019
        
       
      
     
      My calculator is missing the minus button.
      But on the plus side, ...it still works.
 
      
        π︎ 372
         
        
        
        π
︎ Aug 05 2018
        
       
      
     
      I have an old calculator thatβs missing the minus button.
      But on the plus side, it still works.
 
      
        π︎ 50
         
        
        
        π
︎ Jun 18 2019
        
       
      
     
        
        
        
        
      
      My calculator is missing the minus button.
      But on the plus side,...it still works.
 
      
        π︎ 130
         
        
        
        π
︎ Oct 18 2018
        
       
      
     
      What do you get when you cross a calculator and a friend?
      A friend you can count on!
 
      
        π︎ 93
         
        
        
        π
︎ Nov 23 2016
        
       
      
     
      What do you get when you cross a dog and a calculator?
      A friend you can count on!
 
      
        π︎ 54
         
        
        
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︎ Dec 21 2018
        
       
      
     
      I was thinking of buying a pocket calculator.
      but then I thought, "who cares how many pockets I have?"
 
      
        π︎ 859
         
        
        
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︎ Aug 04 2014
        
       
      
      
    
    
    
    
    
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