A band named 1023 MB was very sad, they couldn't get a gig.
This is unoriginal, but it has been reposted so many times i can't even pund it anywhere in the web, I even asked my pet spider where it was orginally found.
Pun 1: >!A gigabyte is actually 1024 MB not 1000 MB!<
Pun 2: >!Spiders makes webs idiot.!<
Why don’t Vikings like to send emails?
They prefer to use Norse code!
more dad style computer jokes at https://puns.dev
How do two programmers make money? One writes viruses, the other anti-viruses.
Where’s the best place to hide a body? Page two of Google.
A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history – with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila.
If it weren’t for C, we’d all be programming in BASI and OBOL.
There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don’t.
In a world without fences and walls, who needs Gates and Windows?
Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.
Never underestimate the bandwidth of a station wagon full of tapes hurling down the highway.
An SQL statement walks into a bar and sees two tables. It approaches, and asks “may I join you?”
Why is it that programmers always confuse Halloween with Christmas?
Because 31 OCT = 25 DEC.
Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft… and the only one that can be mass produced with unskilled labor.
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? None. It’s a hardware problem.
I named my hard drive “dat ass” so once a month my computer asks if I want to ‘back dat ass up’.
I think my neighbor is stalking me as she’s been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
I changed my password to “incorrect”. So whenever I forget what it is the computer will say “Your password is incorrect”.
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
It’s ok computer, I go to sleep after 20 minutes of inactivity too.
Entered what I ate today into my new fitness app and it just sent an ambulance to my house.
A clean house is the sign of a broken computer.
Wifi went down during family dinner tonight. One kid started talking and I didn’t know who he was.
I would like to thank everybody that stuck by my side for those five long minutes my house didn’t have internet.
A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer.
Are you a computer whiz? it seems you know how to turn my software to hardwar
... keep reading on reddit ➡for a tech class, i need a team name. I want a punny one. Any suggestions?
Edit: thanks so much!
It was an Apple with limited memory; just one byte. Then, everything crashed.
Because they're scared of the mouse.
It takes screen shots.
A server
So I went outside and threw it in the sewer
Boss: Hard drive?
Me: No, the commute was fine. It’s my laptop.
She answered:"Because they listen to their motherboards"
I’m not too worried, I think she’s jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf
They just ransomware.
Because it ransomware.
They just log in. My 7yr old daughter just told me this, so proud!
Me: That can’t be comfortable. Try a chair instead.
'cos he was a server
She craves anarchy.
Not sure !! But when it megabytes, it megahertz.
E-GAD!
Trouble-soothing.
My son loves this one with online learning. I only had to explain to him what troubleshooting was 4 times!
Because he was afraid of Capitalism!
To the space bar !!
Computer: password cannot contain symbols
Need all the other computers in the house have slowed down so they can see what happened.
To improve their web-sight
They're calling it the Big Mac
I guess, I've got to start again from scratch.
It had Windows
But this one day, the computer wouldn't stop talking, so I went out and got a Zip drive.
Doc says it’s terminal.
Adele
I guess you could say I have Surface tension.
He especially liked logging in.
Data
Because they listen to their motherboard.
It was an Apple, but with extremely limited memory. Just one byte. And then everything crashed.
Edits: Thanks for all the awards!
His windows was cracked.
It was an Apple with very limited memory. Just 1 byte and everything crashed!
