Collapsed Puns

A list of puns related to "Collapsed"

I decided to stop walking under billboards after one collapsed on top of me.

I took it as a sign from above.

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👤︎ u/JoeFas
📅︎ Mar 07 2021
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Someone has collapsed on the luggage carousel at Heathrow Airport today

Medics at the scene have said " they are coming round slowly "

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👤︎ u/2canVANdam
📅︎ Mar 02 2021
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An old mine shaft collapsed on a bunch of workers the other day.

But it’s okay, they only suffered miner injuries.

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👤︎ u/llcoolg72
📅︎ Dec 17 2020
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A little moron and a big moron were shingling a steep roof when suddenly the scaffolding collapsed. They both slid down the roof and stopped at the very edge, and then one fell off. Which one?

The big moron. The other one was a little more on.

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👤︎ u/big_macaroons
📅︎ Oct 12 2020
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Did you hear about the kindergarten where the roof collapsed?

Thankfully, it only caused minor injuries.

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👤︎ u/Andrelse
📅︎ Jul 31 2020
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A school collapsed on itself during school hours. When did it happen?

After math.

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👤︎ u/ElsonDaSushiChef
📅︎ Jun 11 2020
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When fencing, my friend acted like he collapsed unconscious from fright upon sight of his opponent's epee...

He feinted.

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ Dec 24 2019
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Did you hear about the coal mine that collapsed?

Don't worry there are only minor injuries.

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👤︎ u/Exonated
📅︎ Mar 29 2019
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A man who makes tie dye shirts was trying to borrow money to expand his small business. While filling out the paperwork, he had a heart attack and collapsed, spilling bottles of colored dye all over his documents.

The poor man dyed a loan.

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👤︎ u/boogerknows
📅︎ Nov 26 2019
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There was an accident in the Paleontology section of a Natural History Museum where multiple dinosaur skeletons collapsed and were broken beyond repair. The directors of the museum were concerned that visitors wouldn't visit that section anymore ...

but visitors still showed up to view the
Tyrannosaurus Wrecks.

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👤︎ u/EyeWunderY
📅︎ Jul 22 2019
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There's a bloke just collapsed on the London Eye.

Paramedics are on the scene and they say he's coming round slowly.

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👤︎ u/Stoatwobbler
📅︎ Jun 11 2019
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What did the engineer say to the bridge after it had collapsed?

I trussed you.

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👤︎ u/MCPE_Master_Builder
📅︎ Oct 22 2016
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A man was killed when his bookshelf collapsed....

Police say he had only his shelf to blame.

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👤︎ u/NeGuy1
📅︎ Aug 02 2017
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Too late I realized the new jar of discount mayonnaise felt light. When I opened it up the pristine surface collapsed into a large air pocket.

Yes it was a sinkhole de mayo.

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👤︎ u/JazzboTN
📅︎ May 11 2018
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I was at a sports bar recently when a shelf holding alcohol collapsed.

And in possibly one of my most brilliant moments, I exclaimed: "I guess that shelf.. couldn't hold its liquor".

I thought it was pretty good, anyways.

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👤︎ u/lukeman3000
📅︎ Aug 02 2016
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Did you hear about the dock that collapsed during Hurricane Sandy?

It experienced pier pressure.

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👤︎ u/Wyboth
📅︎ Aug 18 2013
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I got my daughter a pony and tried to hide it in the shed but the shed collapsed

I guess it was unstable.

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👤︎ u/r2devo
📅︎ Jun 11 2018
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What did the Russian say when USSR collapsed?

"Well then... So-vi-et..."

God that was bad.

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👤︎ u/Hansel-356
📅︎ Jun 09 2017
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I heard about a football player who had a heart attack and collapsed on top of his opponent.

He was dead on a rival.

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👤︎ u/mrthatsthat
📅︎ Mar 30 2018
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