So I think I’ll get a quote.
Him: I can explain everything!
(It's his best joke yet I think)
A nervous wreck.
(Citation: my Christmas cracker).
"In honor of this celebration, I'd like to quote the late 20th century philosopher A. Cooper:
School...is out... For summer.
School...is out... Forever.
Let's reflect on these words in our moments together today. Thank you."
I told them I could explain everything.
Their words, not mine.
I'm calling it Crazy Rich Citations
He told me we needed to clean out the toaster because "it was smoking."
I gasped - "It's not 18 yet!"
Buffet the Vampire Slayer
Not my joke! Citation Needed by Tom Scott on YouTube
I work part time as a court clerk.
So I'm sitting in with the judge and another employee about a citation for a person who had a dog off leash and out of a fenced area cited for "running at large" so I asked "so if it's a small dog are they cited for 'running at small'?"
When I came upon a flock of birds in the middle of the road. I expected the birds to all scatter before I hit them, but BAM, one of the birds hit the front of my car, flew over the top, and struck a police officer's car right behind me.
He immediately pulled me over and issued me a citation for flipping him the bird.
Man: Wait, I can explain everything!
