Some might find my dad jokes "childish”.

However, they're perfectly appropriate for groan adults.

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πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2020
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Dad, my girlfriend broke up with me because she said I was too childish

Son, the only way to handle this is to go straight to her house, ring her doorbell and run away.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/chuffedmemes
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2020
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Germans are so childish, they always play with their food.

They play Gluten Tag.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DBTheNerd
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2020
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"You're so childish" said the wife.

"Why do you always have to use that stupid walkie talkie with your stupid friends, this is ridiculous, this relationship is over!"

"This relationship is what? Over"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ May 15 2020
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I seem to have misplaced my bumper book of childish humour

I wonder where I poo tit.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fingerbob73
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2020
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What's the most childish part of your body?

Your KIDneys.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Olwek
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2019
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My wife wanted to have a talk with me because she thinks I’m too childish.

But she didn’t have the password to my pillow fort, so I couldn’t let her in.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2018
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Childish boligrapho
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MA1LB0X
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2018
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Childish Gambino is so immature

I’ll only listen to him when he’s Adultish Gambino

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lynnrae
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2018
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This sub is so childish
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thafezz
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2017
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I'm always asked to put on a new diaper for our baby, but I childishly refuse.

My wife wishes I would change.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bbtehbuild
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2019
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I couldn't believe my friend when he said he sterile...

I said, "no kidding?!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2020
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Ban Fire (It's pronounced Bawn)
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrSmartypants12
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2019
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πŸ‘€︎ u/N-Slash
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2017
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Tom's dad didn't let him sleep last night

He had to prevent the kid napping

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thericheat
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2018
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Dad, how much money do you make?

A man came home from work late again, tired and irritated, to find his 5 year old son waiting for him at the door.

β€œDaddy, may I ask you a question ?”

β€œYeah, sure, what is it ?” replied the man.

β€œDaddy, how much money do you make an hour?”

β€œThat’s none of your business! What makes you ask such a thing?” the man said angrily.

β€œI just want to know.Β  Please tell me, how much do you make an hour?” pleaded the little boy.

β€œIf you must know, I make $20.00 an hour.”

β€œOh,” the little boy replied, head bowed.

Looking up, he said, β€œDaddy, may I borrow $9.00 please?”

The father was furious. β€œIf the only reason you wanted to know how much money I make is just so you can borrow some to buy a silly toy or some other nonsense, then you march yourself straight to your room and go to bed.Β Β  Think about why you’re being so selfish.Β  I work long, hard hours every day and don’t have time for such childish games.”

The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door.

The man sat down and started to get even madder about the little boy’s questioning.Β  How dare he ask such questions only to get some money.

After an hour or so, the man had calmed down, and started to think he may have been a little hard on his son.Β  May be there was something he really needed to buy with that $9.00 and he really didn’t ask for money very often.

The man went to the door of the little boy’s room and opened the door.Β  β€œAre you asleep son?” he asked.

β€œNo daddy, I’m awake,” replied the boy.

β€œI’ve been thinking, maybe I was too hard on you earlier,” said the man.Β  β€œIt’s been long day and I took my aggravation out on you. Here’s that $9.00 you asked for.”

The little boy sat straight up, beaming.

β€œOh, thank you daddy!” he yelled.

Then, reaching under his pillow, he pulled out some more crumpled up bills.Β  The man, seeing that the boy already had money, started to get angry again.

The little boy slowly counted out his money, then looked up at the man.

β€œWhy did you want more money if you already had some?” the father grumbled.

β€œBecause I didn’t have enough, but now I do,” the little boy replied.

β€œDaddy, I have $20.00 now.Β  Can I buy an hour of your time?”

The father looked upon his son with a smile as he walked towards the door and said "Overtime is double pay."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cleverley1986
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2017
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What's an emery board for your toenails?

A pedi-file.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Condor87
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2017
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I do not understand all this hype about Donald Glover.....

He's kinda Childish tbh.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FeetofMario
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2018
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GF: You're no fun to shop with because you have no patience.

Me: That's because I'm not a doctor.

I chuckled. She didn't.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RonLlave
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2014
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Arguments with kids...

are just childish.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/2076baseballbat
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2017
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I'd like to share a dadjoke that happened at work yesterday.

The waitress waked into the kitchen at my work and this exchange followed:

Waitress: I am so hungry.

Me: Hi, So Hungry, I'm Dan.

Guy beside me: Nice to meet you I'm Friday. Come back Saturday and I'll give you a sundae.

He and I broke into childish laughter at this. I didn't see her face, but with that kind of joke, you don't need to.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/iamnotparanoid
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2013
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Dad-in-law joked

Today at lunch my father-in-law said, "Of course I'll pay for her food. She's my daughter, after all. No kidding!"

As a father myself, I had to respond: "That was kind of childish, don't you think?"

Not to be outdone, he whipped back with: "Apparently."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/UTAlan
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2014
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