Why don’t catholic priest talk about molestation in the church?

It’s a touchy subject.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dose172
πŸ“…︎ May 14
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What do you call a Catholic priest that becomes a lawyer?

A Father in law.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Alexshinoda117
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01
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A Catholic priest, a Baptist preacher, and a rabbit walk into a bar.

There rabbit takes a look around the joint and says, "I'm beginning to think I'm a typo."

πŸ‘︎ 59
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dunn_with_this
πŸ“…︎ Feb 21
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I stopped returning calls and texting back the local catholic priest...

You could say I holy ghosted him.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kotetsu454
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04
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My friend is a Roman Catholic priest, great at his job - he absolutely kills it every Sunday.

He’s a mass murderer.

πŸ‘︎ 59
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πŸ‘€︎ u/procrastiprov
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2019
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What do a Christmas tree and a catholic priest have in common?

Their balls are there for show and a child’s enjoyment.

Sorry.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bryce-I-guess
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2018
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My wife's dad is both a lawyer and a Catholic priest. I guess that makes him a Father at-Law
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2019
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Why was the Catholic priest so fit?

He exorcised.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/WhiteWalterBlack
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2018
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What do you call a Catholic priest who became a lawyer ?

A father-in-law

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πŸ‘€︎ u/music_snobbbb
πŸ“…︎ Aug 14 2018
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When is a Dad joke not a Dad joke.

When it's told by a Catholic Priest.

Then it's a Father joke.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/urbanek2525
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06
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What do you call a pastor who wanders from town to town, looking for leafy green vegetables?

A romaine Catholic priest.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2019
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If my son became a priest.........

Would I call him "Father"?

πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mightypaper
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05 2017
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A classic groaner

Once in a land far, far away there lived a group of people called Trids. The Trids were happy except for the huge ogre that lived on the mountain. The ogre would periodically terrorize the Trids.

The Trids tired of the ogre and sought to reason with him. They thought one of their religious leaders would be a good intermediary. So a group of Trids and their minister went up the mountain and before they could even say one word the ogre kicked them down the mountain. Not being dismayed the Trids thought that maybe the ogre was Catholic, so they sent another delegation, this time led by the local priest. But alas, as they approached the ogre he once again kicked them all down the mountain.

The Trids were upset until they thought that perhaps the ogre was Jewish. Unfortunately, no Trids were Jewish, so they wrote to the people of another land and asked them to send a Rabbi to help them with the ogre. The Rabbi arrived and led a delegation of Trids up the mountain. The ogre saw them coming

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hometown45
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2013
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Dad jokes vs Father jokes

Dad and I went to the movies are a few years ago to see the second Lord Of The Rings movie and we found ourselves sitting a row in front of the catholic priest, Father John, who married dad and my step mother. We were in a small rural town so they started chatting about local sport and affairs and so on.

The trailers start and they kept talking quietly. Suddenly, a preview for "The Passion Of The Christ" comes on. Afterwards dad says

"Oh, that looks like one for you, Father"

Father John looks a little unsure

"Yeah, well, I've already read the book..."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zenkraft
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2014
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So a man sees his pastor at a liquor store on Sunday...

A man sees a priest buying hard liquor on a Sunday at a shop down the street from the church the priest is the pastor of. Surprised, the man, who went to that church, asked why he was buying a 5th of Jagermeister.

The priest said, "it's an old catholic secret that Jagermeister helps ease constipation, which one of the nuns has.

So the guy shrugs and leaves, only to see the priest later that day, not halfway back to the church, drunk as a skunk in the gutter, tipping the brown paper bag with Jagermeister in it all the way back as he drinks it.

He pulls up in his car and asks, "I thought you said it was for a nun's constipation!?"

The priest grunted, "It is! She's going to shit herself when she sees me like this!"

I'm posting this, my grandfather's joke, in honor of him passing a few months ago.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/im_from_detroit
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2015
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