Dating between carbon descendants
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/dattara
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 14 2020
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In love with Carbon
πŸ‘οΈŽ 6k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/LazyYoda
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 09 2020
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What do you call a feline paralyzed from drinking carbonated water?

Catatonic

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/bodaciousblonde124
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 03 2021
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A tree’s wood is 50% carbon, 42% oxygen, 6% hydrogen, 1% nitrogen

You can call it a chemis-tree

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Wergio256
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 12 2020
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The Carbon Monoxide detector went of last night,

Can't say I remember why though.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Depressed_Lasagna420
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 30 2020
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I stopped walking on coal to limit my carbon footprint
πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Dutch_Midget
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 01 2020
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iron told carbon a joke so funny...

that he decided to steel it

πŸ‘οΈŽ 64
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/tac_force_knife
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 23 2020
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Why were the paleontologists kissing?

They were carbon dating

πŸ‘οΈŽ 17
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/gameboy90
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 30 2020
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Did you hear about the new dating website for chemists?

It's called carbon dating.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 64
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Imholt11
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 27 2020
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What did the Lithium ion battery say to the Zinc-Carbon battery?

You only live once.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 16
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/kilokiilo
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 06 2020
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A revolutionary new way of cutting carbon emissions, shortcuts under hills that can only be used by cars with more than 2 occupants

I call it Carpool Tunnel

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Raymonator88
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 28 2020
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My friend showed me his plan to get and drink a frozen carbonated beverage available in fruit and soda flavors.

"Icee!" I exclaimed exuberantly.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 06 2020
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What Chinese cooking utensil is carbon-neutal, vegan and gluten free?

A woke

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Vicdomen
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 24 2020
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I don’t have a carbon footprint

because I just drive everywhere

πŸ‘οΈŽ 24
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/pandacoat
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 25 2020
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Mineral water can be non-carbonated.

But it's still water.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Heavenly-Raven
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 07 2020
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I graduated with a Chemistry degree, but the only job I got was testing carbonated beverages.

It was Soda grading.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 120
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 18 2019
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Two carbons walk into a bar together, they had a few drinks and really liked each other by the end of it.

Carbon dating

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Hank_the_Hand
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 27 2019
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What's a pirate's favourite element in the periodic table?

Gold. Why would he like argon or carbon

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Schrodingers_liar
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 01 2020
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I went out with a coal miner's daughter. I guess you could say I was carbon dated.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/NewGamerOK
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 29 2018
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My friend who worked at an orange soda factory said they had small boats in thier factory

I heard they go sailing on the hi-c's

πŸ‘οΈŽ 25
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/gnar_owl
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 22 2020
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Everyone in a house died from carbon monoxide poisoning...

Except the kids. They were in the living room.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/HerpDerpMcChirp
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 26 2019
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I see and It's Carbon, Radium, Phosphorus... (CRaP)
πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/mralijey
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 25 2019
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My grandfathers last wish was that we convert his ashes into a diamond.

That’s a lot of pressure.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 14 2019
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What do you call a calcium carbonate flavoured latte?

A chalk-latte

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/pabesh17
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 31 2019
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I soda not see that comming
πŸ‘οΈŽ 4k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MrwaffleMssyrup
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 12 2019
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You cannot buy a carbonated beverage any larger than 8 oz in the state of Minnesota
πŸ‘οΈŽ 21
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Money_fingers
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 14 2018
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What do you call a vehicle made out is carbon and argon? (OC)

A CAr

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ships-n-dip
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 11 2018
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The Tinder 'date' guarantee -- Dated / Outdated / Carbon-dated
πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Kauntest
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 20 2018
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Why did the Ironlady never had a kid with the carbon man?

It was high chances it could be a steelborn.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Kardight
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 03 2019
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What do you get when you replace the carbonation in a cola with helium?

A coke float.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/yaboymas
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 26 2019
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I took the batteries out of the carbon monoxide alarm

I was starting to get a headache and getting dizzy from the beeping

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/defintelynotyou
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 21 2019
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What did carbon say as it killed its two closest friends?

Die oxide.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ShadowPlayer51
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 08 2019
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Why should you never take six carbon atoms on a boat?

You will get C6

πŸ‘οΈŽ 75
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Feelwizard
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 11 2015
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My friend died by consuming excess amounts of Calcium Carbonate.

He chalked himself to death.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/sodomicity
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 08 2019
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I built and sold a machine which can detect and remove carbon monoxide from the air.

My customer says he is very happy with the CO-OPERATION

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Born4Dota2
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 14 2019
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If you are born in a car and die outside, you are literally

Carbon Dioxide

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Tutrois
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 27 2020
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My grandfather keeps telling us that when he dies, we should try to convert his ashes into a diamond.

That’s a lot of pressure.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 29 2019
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My son dressed up as Satan and started combining oxygen, nitrogen, argon, carbon dioxide and methane.

He's got a real Devil-make-air attitude.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 22 2018
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Why are Christians so opposed to carbon dating?

Because they think carbon should be married already.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 24
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/GeeZeR_FroG
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 17 2018
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My mom bought nasty sparkling water drinks. My brother said it tasted like devil incarnate.

I said it tasted like devil carbonate :D

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/persimmonsareawesome
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 09 2020
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Which animal lives underground and conists of exactly 12 gramms of carbon?

A mole

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Jockl132
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 24 2018
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What do you call illegal trafficking of carbon dioxide?

smoggling

πŸ‘οΈŽ 13
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/murO420
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 30 2018
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Carbon dating
πŸ‘οΈŽ 163
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/elpintogrande
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 03 2014
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Why is fatty acid the coolest carbon chain?

Because it's fat with a pH

πŸ‘οΈŽ 35
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/An_Arrogant_Ass
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 12 2017
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Physiology used to be the study of carbonated soda.

Until they changed the spelling.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 20
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ajumpsbshoots
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 19 2017
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What's the difference between soda and pop?

One is a carbonated beverage. The other is a method of bursting bubbles.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/tvkyle
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 20 2020
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Modern supercars are mostly made of carbon

Including the driver.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TheMexicanJuan
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 22 2018
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What school subject does thr production of carbonated beverages fall under?

Chemistry or fizz-ics?

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Skystrike7
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 30 2017
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