Need candy puns for a short film!

Basically, the short is about a gingerbread man who is addicted to sugar. He goes to a Sugarholics Anonymous meeting and there are motivational posters on the wall:

Donut Give Up! Yes You Candy!

... Looking for more ideas, and figured you guys are the people to ask. Donut let me down!

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SSCC88
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2018
🚨︎ report
How does a candy bar laugh

It snickers

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/whyitdoiexist
πŸ“…︎ May 24 2021
🚨︎ report
As a kid I could walk into a store with a dollar and come out with 2 candy bars and a bag of chips

And now they have cameras.

πŸ‘︎ 39
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/flebrolo
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2021
🚨︎ report
A boy is shoving candy into his face when his mom yells at him to stop.

"Don't eat so much candy all at once!"

"Why?" the boy replied.

"If you eat too much candy, you're stomach will get bigger, and bigger, and it will eventually explode!"

The boy is shocked by this image an immediately stops eating candy. The next day, the boy and mom go to church together, and the boy sits down next to a very visibly pregnant woman. The boy looks at her stomach, then up to her face, and says, "I know what you've been doing."

πŸ‘︎ 2k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/winklesnad31
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2021
🚨︎ report
What’s every road-worker’s favorite candy?

A pavemint.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/vanillathunda1989
πŸ“…︎ May 18 2021
🚨︎ report
At my grandma’s funeral there was a bowl of her favorite candy on the table.

They were bereavements.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/pippingigi
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2021
🚨︎ report
Easter Candy?
πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SlickHeadSinger
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2021
🚨︎ report
I own a pristine collection of candy canes...

they're all in mint condition!

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2021
🚨︎ report
I had to stop a candy thief today.

He was getting back to his old Twix.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Bonanza86
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2021
🚨︎ report
Who DOESN'T enjoy a little eye candy on a Wednesday afternoon?
πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MyLatestInvention
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2021
🚨︎ report
Proud dad moment: My five year old and I were discussing Halloween candy. I told him I like Kit-Kats.

He picked out a Butterfinger from his bag, held it up, and said β€œKit-Kats are good but these are butter.”

πŸ‘︎ 3k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/chrisoatkins
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
🚨︎ report
I once took a trip to Seattle on a plane in which the stewards only served candy made when peanut butter meets milk chocolate...

I don't know how far this Reese eating airline goes...

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2021
🚨︎ report
Today I learned the Easter candy workers went on strike in 2016...

They chanted β€œNo justice, no Peeps!” on the picket line

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JamesPerrenoud
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2021
🚨︎ report
What is an astronaut's favorite candy bar?

Milky way

πŸ‘︎ 29
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Brady01234
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2021
🚨︎ report
Now and later candies are changing thier name.

It offends those who have already done it.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/djnipe
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05 2021
🚨︎ report
A Fun Fact About Candy Cane Shrimp [OC]
πŸ‘︎ 49
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ChumpsLand
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I ate all my toddlers candy.

It was a snaccident

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/gp_11
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2021
🚨︎ report
I was told not to eat the candy in court...

Those are judge mints

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hotsprings1234
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05 2021
🚨︎ report
What’s a girl’s favorite candy bar?

Her/she

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MangoAway17
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife gave me an ultimatum. It was either her or my addiction to sweets.

The decision was a piece of cake.

πŸ‘︎ 11k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LordCinko
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2021
🚨︎ report
What's the best ride in Candy Land?

The Rollo' Coaster

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the dad who has the world's largest candy cane collection?

They're all in mint condition.

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/culculain
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
🚨︎ report
I don’t like candy bars anymore

They always Snicker at me

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AshamedTurtwig
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a happy cowboy?

A jolly rancher

πŸ‘︎ 5k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2021
🚨︎ report
The second time Hansel and Gretel found a house made of cookies and candy, they sent someone else in to test-nibble it first.

This technique became known as Munch Housen by Proxy.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/klwill1192
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2021
🚨︎ report
What kind of candy is neve on time ?

Chocolate.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a tiny mother?

A minimum!

πŸ‘︎ 85
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Feveroth
πŸ“…︎ Apr 13 2021
🚨︎ report
Every year I'm surprised at how cheap candy canes are...

You'd think they'd be more expensive - they're in mint condition!

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Why wouldn’t the crab share his Halloween candy?

He’s shellfish

πŸ‘︎ 35
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Anddditburns
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2020
🚨︎ report
They just don’t taste right!
πŸ‘︎ 9k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Gacha_gurlOwO
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2020
🚨︎ report
What candy do KKK members eat?

Racist peanut butter cups

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/impendingfuckery
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Why couldn't Gavin resist eating the candy?

Because he Gavin!

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Springbonnie1893
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend knows just who he can trust in the seedy part of town to get him safe candy and sweets...

He has treat smarts.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2020
🚨︎ report
I gave my wife a nickname and it's "Candy"

She thinks it's sweet

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Slymood
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Whats a Sheeps favorite snack?

A Candy Baa (Bar)

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/stupidman44
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2021
🚨︎ report
What candy tells the truth?

...a nestle speaking

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/arc-ion
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a candy which doesn't like to be with others?

A lonelypop

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/D0R0B0
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife got really mad at me for stabbing a vampire to death today

I guess I was supposed to give them candy because it’s β€œHalloween”

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ebrow9
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2021
🚨︎ report
Its important to keep some candy in your pocket at all times.

It could be a lifesaver.

πŸ‘︎ 6k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Spotter66
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2019
🚨︎ report
What is Vladimer Putin's favourite candy?

Novichokolate

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Mehrtellica
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2020
🚨︎ report
My son ate too much Easter candy one year, and threw it all up making loud wailing sounds as he did so.

I didn't want to hear another Peep out of him.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Random thoughts into Dad Poem

I dad walked into a bar

He ask for Candy in a Jar

The bar tender looked at him queer

Hey mister . we only have beer here

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Benny7770
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2021
🚨︎ report
I am going to decorate my next christmas tree with miniature tnt sticks instead of candy canes

Oh tannen-bomb oh tannen-bomb...

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Calthropstu
πŸ“…︎ Jul 05 2020
🚨︎ report
I tried juggling some candy bars but kept dropping them.

I have Butterfingers.

πŸ‘︎ 45
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bhjeff
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2020
🚨︎ report
I knew a guy who collected candy canes.

They were all in mint condition

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/howiewu0402
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2020
🚨︎ report
*pulls candy bar out of thin air*

Kid: WOW are you a magician?

Me: no, but I have a couple of twix up my sleeve

πŸ‘︎ 76
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/renskappert
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Why was the German boy sad when sister ran away with his 3-Musketeers Candy Bar ??

Because he was Far-from-nougat!

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bad11ama
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2020
🚨︎ report
Look out for cold sores when sharing candy this Valentine's day...

Mine went from Mounds of Joy to Herpes Kisses.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2020
🚨︎ report
I need candy puns

Please give me puns I can quickly shout while walking through the hallway and chucking candy after screaming the pun. Preferably candy you would get on Halloween. Thank you for helping me out.

You are Musketeers of my heart.

.............

i hate myself

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/energized-pickle
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2019
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.