Need candy puns for a short film!
Basically, the short is about a gingerbread man who is addicted to sugar. He goes to a Sugarholics Anonymous meeting and there are motivational posters on the wall:
Donut Give Up!
Yes You Candy!
... Looking for more ideas, and figured you guys are the people to ask. Donut let me down!
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︎ Jan 30 2018
How does a candy bar laugh
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︎ May 24 2021
As a kid I could walk into a store with a dollar and come out with 2 candy bars and a bag of chips
And now they have cameras.
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︎ May 23 2021
A boy is shoving candy into his face when his mom yells at him to stop.
"Don't eat so much candy all at once!"
"Why?" the boy replied.
"If you eat too much candy, you're stomach will get bigger, and bigger, and it will eventually explode!"
The boy is shocked by this image an immediately stops eating candy. The next day, the boy and mom go to church together, and the boy sits down next to a very visibly pregnant woman. The boy looks at her stomach, then up to her face, and says, "I know what you've been doing."
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︎ Mar 02 2021
Whatβs every road-workerβs favorite candy?
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︎ May 18 2021
At my grandmaβs funeral there was a bowl of her favorite candy on the table.
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︎ May 23 2021
Easter Candy?
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︎ Apr 04 2021
I own a pristine collection of candy canes...
they're all in mint condition!
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︎ Apr 22 2021
I had to stop a candy thief today.
He was getting back to his old Twix.
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︎ Apr 22 2021
Who DOESN'T enjoy a little eye candy on a Wednesday afternoon?
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︎ Feb 10 2021
Proud dad moment: My five year old and I were discussing Halloween candy. I told him I like Kit-Kats.
He picked out a Butterfinger from his bag, held it up, and said βKit-Kats are good but these are butter.β
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︎ Nov 09 2020
I once took a trip to Seattle on a plane in which the stewards only served candy made when peanut butter meets milk chocolate...
I don't know how far this Reese eating airline goes...
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︎ Mar 18 2021
Today I learned the Easter candy workers went on strike in 2016...
They chanted βNo justice, no Peeps!β on the picket line
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︎ Apr 04 2021
What is an astronaut's favorite candy bar?
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︎ Jan 24 2021
Now and later candies are changing thier name.
It offends those who have already done it.
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︎ Mar 05 2021
A Fun Fact About Candy Cane Shrimp [OC]
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︎ Dec 25 2020
I ate all my toddlers candy.
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︎ Feb 08 2021
I was told not to eat the candy in court...
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︎ Jan 05 2021
Whatβs a girlβs favorite candy bar?
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︎ Nov 18 2020
My wife gave me an ultimatum. It was either her or my addiction to sweets.
The decision was a piece of cake.
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︎ Jan 31 2021
What's the best ride in Candy Land?
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︎ Dec 18 2020
Did you hear about the dad who has the world's largest candy cane collection?
They're all in mint condition.
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︎ Dec 06 2020
I donβt like candy bars anymore
They always Snicker at me
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︎ Dec 01 2020
What do you call a happy cowboy?
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︎ Jan 31 2021
The second time Hansel and Gretel found a house made of cookies and candy, they sent someone else in to test-nibble it first.
This technique became known as Munch Housen by Proxy.
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︎ Jan 01 2021
What kind of candy is neve on time ?
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︎ Dec 05 2020
What do you call a tiny mother?
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︎ Apr 13 2021
Every year I'm surprised at how cheap candy canes are...
You'd think they'd be more expensive - they're in mint condition!
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︎ Oct 11 2020
Why wouldnβt the crab share his Halloween candy?
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︎ Oct 31 2020
They just donβt taste right!
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︎ Nov 27 2020
What candy do KKK members eat?
Racist peanut butter cups
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︎ Nov 19 2020
Why couldn't Gavin resist eating the candy?
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︎ Nov 12 2020
My friend knows just who he can trust in the seedy part of town to get him safe candy and sweets...
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︎ Oct 16 2020
I gave my wife a nickname and it's "Candy"
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︎ Oct 05 2020
Whats a Sheeps favorite snack?
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︎ Apr 26 2021
What candy tells the truth?
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︎ Oct 21 2020
What do you call a candy which doesn't like to be with others?
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︎ Nov 02 2020
My wife got really mad at me for stabbing a vampire to death today
I guess I was supposed to give them candy because itβs βHalloweenβ
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︎ May 04 2021
Its important to keep some candy in your pocket at all times.
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︎ May 02 2019
What is Vladimer Putin's favourite candy?
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︎ Sep 24 2020
My son ate too much Easter candy one year, and threw it all up making loud wailing sounds as he did so.
I didn't want to hear another Peep out of him.
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︎ Sep 15 2020
Random thoughts into Dad Poem
I dad walked into a bar
He ask for Candy in a Jar
The bar tender looked at him queer
Hey mister . we only have beer here
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︎ May 05 2021
I am going to decorate my next christmas tree with miniature tnt sticks instead of candy canes
Oh tannen-bomb oh tannen-bomb...
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︎ Jul 05 2020
I tried juggling some candy bars but kept dropping them.
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︎ Mar 19 2020
I knew a guy who collected candy canes.
They were all in mint condition
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︎ Jul 02 2020
*pulls candy bar out of thin air*
Kid: WOW are you a magician?
Me: no, but I have a couple of twix up my sleeve
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︎ Feb 01 2020
Why was the German boy sad when sister ran away with his 3-Musketeers Candy Bar ??
Because he was Far-from-nougat!
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︎ Jul 31 2020
Look out for cold sores when sharing candy this Valentine's day...
Mine went from Mounds of Joy to Herpes Kisses.
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︎ Feb 15 2020
I need candy puns
Please give me puns I can quickly shout while walking through the hallway and chucking candy after screaming the pun. Preferably candy you would get on Halloween. Thank you for helping me out.
You are Musketeers of my heart.
.............
i hate myself
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︎ Nov 01 2019
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