Gravity is such a bummer

Brings me down every day

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Eater-of-Tacos
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2019
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Sometimes physics can be a real bummer.

I was thinking about gravity yesterday and it really brought me down.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/forsakenexile
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2018
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Punny suicide
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nokarateinthepit1
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2021
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I recently did a joke about a suicide bomber not having a return ticket

and it bombed

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πŸ‘€︎ u/listeningSaint
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2020
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I just finished the book, "How to Become Homeless"...

It's such a bummer.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11 2020
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Two wind turbines sit in the ocean, one turns to the other and says β€œWhat music do you listen to?”

The turbine says β€œI’m a massive heavy metal fan”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Richie31213
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2019
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What do you call a depressed traffic jam?

Bummer to bummer traffic

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BlankPhotos
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2020
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I was out playing Pokemon with my fiance when I approached a group of teens with their phones out. "Hey, I'm looking for my friend Amal..."

"Have you seen him? He's a tall Pakistani guy. Can't miss him." "No, sorry man." "Bummer... Yeah I've gotta catch Amal."

My fiance nearly threw her engagement ring at me for that one.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BriansBalloons
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2016
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Gay guys don't have sex.

They have everything butt sex.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bobzilla
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2016
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Disappointing Anal Sex

It is a bummer

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thatShanksguy09
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2018
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I broke my ass the other day

It's really a bummer

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zorchi
πŸ“…︎ Jun 13 2019
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Jesus said to John,

"Come forth and receive eternal life", but John came fifth, so all he got was a toaster.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Richboy12345
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2018
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Somebody stole my newspaper hat!

Such a bummer, it was my favorite article of clothing.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kopextacy
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2017
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Doctor's Appointment

Mom: The doctor says I have to go for a colonoscopy next week.

Dad: That's a bummer.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Game7
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2013
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Was driving with my dad earlier today

As we were driving, we saw a car on the side of the road that looked as if it had broken down.

Dad: I guess it wont start

Me: That looks like a bummer.

Dad: Looks more like a Mercedes Benz to me.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Synergy_synner
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2017
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I think I've taken this one to a whole new level

Dave is working at his job at the Time Travel Factory when his partner Bob comes back in his own time machine. "Come quick Dave!" he says "I just got back from the Middle Ages and have met a prince!" So Dave climbs into Bob's machine and they head to the Middle Ages.

They arrive at a castle and immediately meet the prince Bob was talking about. "Your Majesty" says Bob "Allow me to introduce my friend Dave. He works with me at the Time Traveling factory." As Dave bows, the Prince says "It is an honor to meet you my loyal subject. I am a Prince. My mother and father are Queen and King of this kingdom."

"It is even more of an honor to meet you, Your Highness" says Dave. "I have never met royalty before."

"It is indeed a rare honor for most subjects." said the prince. "Because of a strict guideline of pre-arranged marriage and inbreeding, there are only a small number of us around."

"Er...ok..." said Dave. "So tell me Prince, how vast is your kingdom."

"It is most large" said the Prince. "However my population has been dwindling lately. In recent months, I've had to behead a large number of my subjects. It fulfills my bloodlust and desire for authoritarian control by any means necessary."

Clearly uncomfortable, Dave turns to Bob and quietly says "I hate to say it, but this prince you've found is kind of a bummer."

Bob said to Dave "Well what did you expect, I told you. I have meta prince.

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 23 2017
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My own joke caught me off guard.

My sister was complaining that all she could buy for underwear was ugly ones because she has wide hips even though the rest of her is skinny. I wasn't really paying attention and said "aw yeah..that's a bummer."

She looked at me like "oh haha very funny." I was confused for a half a second until I thought about what I had just said.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/seaweed_is_cool
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2015
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My dad on law school

Dad: Did you have your test today?

Me: Yup, evidence. It was brutal.

Dad: Bummer. "Evidently" it wasn't your favorite subject.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CrimsonYllek
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2013
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