Me: I think we have some pear cider leftover from last night. Dad: You wouldn't want that, it'd make you impeared.
A fizzician
A chew chew train
I said, βYou donβt notice a vas deferens.β
I wish he wasn't influenced so much by pop culture.
Don't know. It popped out of nowhere.
Hey guys! I am getitng a puppy in a few months and her name is supposed to be Zoe. However since she is pure golden retriever because of some laws her full name has to to be βGive me your βnameββ and I want it to be some kind of pun containing the word βZoeβ since that what sheβs gonna be called like Zoedorable but something that matches the sentence and I though that maybe you guys can help.
Postaste
Bubble 07
Improbable.
I came so close to winning but I blew it
She hated the chews
He was Boba-fettered.
Pop
Yes son I do.
Me: Well he's back in town and he's looking for you
It'd make cents off so many levels.
/edit:rephrased punchline
A soap opera!
"Goodbye water, you will be mist."
Next week the museum I work at begins a three-week run of what we call Bubblefest. There will be bubbles everywhere, a bubble laser show, all kinds of exhibits and interactive shows explaining some of the science involved with bubbles. So I need some jokes and puns to replace the old standby of "my pop is bigger than your pop!"
When I bought her some liquid nitrogen bubble bath.
a boba fete!
...I'll just show myself out.
Unbeliebubble
I call it the HEPA-weizen.
Bubble gum
"See ya later said the blind man!"
Double Bubble
"Well, of course I did."
"Well, he's back in town and wants your number."
My dad told this joke to me for the first time when I was like 10.
My 3 month old son is blowing bubbles, and my wife says, "I hope we get giggles out of you soon!"
I said, "He's pretty close, maybe next year!"
Wife to son: "That's the oldest dad joke in the book, buddy!"
Me: "It gets older every year!"
Foam is where the art is.
Cause it was a chew chew.
I got a daughter otw, and the gf got me a book of dad jokes, more to come!
It left a bad taste in my mouth.
Kung Fu Man Chew
I know it's been done before, and many a dad before me and many a dad after me will get to experience this, but in these dark times this was a ray of light that pierced me right to the core with joy.
I came home, and my bright and bubbly ballerina 6 year old runs up and says can I have a hug!?
She asks very tentatively because she knows I have been out all day and the routine is for me to grab a shower (COVID) before I let them get all over me.
So I say, not yet I'm dirty.
She says awww... then she turns to walk away, but then spins back around and looks at me dead in the eye and says:
Hi! um...
wait a sec,
um, I know um,
um, wait.... dir...
[Face beams the biggest smile of accomplishment]
Hi Dirty! I'm [daughter]!
I know we have those proud moments when they turn, but man her delivery, the awkwardness, and the sheer pride she beamed out when she realized she just pulled the reverse dad joke on me...
It's not the getting reverse dad'd, it's the joy and pride she had... she could have just graduated college, and that's how big her beaming smile was right then...
It's a memory I am going to keep and it really lit up this dark time.
Pop!
Because he is a chew chew train
Bubble 07
Chew chew train.
Bubble O 7
Bubble O7.
Bubble 07
