Dung beetle walks into a bar....

"Is this stool taken?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2021
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What is a dung beetle's favorite holiday song?

"All I Want for Christmas is Poo"

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/coffa_cuppee
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2020
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Beatle in a Beetle in a Beetle
πŸ‘︎ 161
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πŸ‘€︎ u/animalsinthings
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
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Dung Beetles know how to keep their shit together
πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LeiuqezE54
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23 2020
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What does an elephant and an old beetle have in common?

Trunk's at the front.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ“…︎ May 18 2020
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I answered the door this morning. A 6ft beetle punched me in the face and called me a fat old man...

Apparently there's a nasty bug going round!

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cotswoldboy
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2019
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This vaccination VW Beetle: "The Flu Bug"
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NigGorilla666
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2019
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Why was the dung beetle mad at the store clerk?

Because the clerk sold him shampoo.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ikemikek
πŸ“…︎ Nov 14 2019
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There's a beetle in my room

It bugs me.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nterhoeschen
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2019
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Beetle juicing on r/beetlejuicing
πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/feisty_paint_girl
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2019
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Why was the dung beetle late for the party?

He was on duty.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tr4vel
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2019
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Someone asked me, if I were forced to, would I eat a big beetle or a small one?

I chose the smaller one of course! It’s the lesser of the two weevils.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/spacecadet6966
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2018
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A dung beetle spent an entire day rolling a ball of dung up a hill, only to have it fall into a ravine on the other side...

...needless to say, he lost his sh*t.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shi-Rokku
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2018
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My pen pal in Jordan has a job at a horror house. He dresses up as a large beetle and chases people.

He’s a scarab.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ToroZuzuX
πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2018
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What’s a dung beetle’s favorite app?

Turds With Friends

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mistermajik2000
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2018
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Two beetles run into each other in a week old baguette

One says to the other, 'I thought I was the only beetle around these parts. Where are you from?'

The other responds, 'Who, me? I was born in bread right here.'

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JephriB
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2018
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Did you hear about the new Dung Beetle Simulator?

That shit's gonna be ballin'.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Iinneus
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2013
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πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/itsthetie
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2015
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Daughter comes out of bathroom screaming about a beetle on the floor

Is it John, George, Paul or Ringo?

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/__roasted
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2015
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Me: "That's a big beetle!"

Dad: "Is it a Liverpool Beetle?" Me: "I don't know...what do they look like?" Dad: "When they're young they have long shaggy black hair and wear a suit. When they get older they look like hippies but vary..." Me: "Just stop, dad."

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DocGull
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2015
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While doing yard work, I found a beetle on my glove...

Me: "Oh, hey, there's a beetle on my glove!"

Dad: "Which one? John, Paul, Ringo, or George?"

Me: "...Ugh. Jeez."

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WaffleBrothel
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2014
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Driving down the road with my dad and he sees an old Volkswagen beetle without the rear hood...

"Hey, you can see all the junk inside her trunk."

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WhiteBaconPrince
πŸ“…︎ Oct 16 2014
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Dad dropped this while I was trying to kill a beetle.

Me: Stomping on beetle Dad: What are you doing over there? Me: Trying to kill this beetle. Dad: Which Beatle? John Lennon? Ringo Starr? Paul McCartney? Me: Haha no. stomping vigorously It's the stupid kind that doesn't DIE! Dad: ...Well we know it isn't Lennon.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thetacoslayer
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2013
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A dung beetle walks into a bar...

Is this stool taken?

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/yelkyelk
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2021
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A dung beetle walks into a bar...

and says to the bartender, "Excuse me, is this stool taken?"

πŸ‘︎ 45
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πŸ‘€︎ u/grandma1967
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2020
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A dung beetle walks into a bar and asks

Is this stool taken?

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/1Autotech
πŸ“…︎ Feb 01 2020
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A dung beetle walks into a bar and asks the bartender

Is this stool taken?

πŸ‘︎ 104
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cincinnatistuff
πŸ“…︎ May 28 2019
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A dung beetle walks into a bar ..

.. and asks, β€œIs this stool taken?”

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/keep_calm_wack_on
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23 2019
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A dung beetle walks into a bar and he says to the bartender...

Is this stool taken?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ellsworthless
πŸ“…︎ Jul 04 2018
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A dung beetle walked into a bar and said

Is this stool taken?

πŸ‘︎ 49
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πŸ‘€︎ u/coot32
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2018
🚨︎ report

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