Told a joke about a Mennonite baseball player, but no one laughed

A swing and Amish

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πŸ‘€︎ u/2many_hobbies
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2021
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Why did the baseball player go to the bathroom?

Because he had the runs.

(Courtesy my 9 year old)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/graessrj
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2021
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Why did the baseball player leave to go to his moms house in the middle of the game?

He made a home run

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Snowjoggs
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11 2021
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Former baseball player Curt Schilling, former Vice President Mike Pence, and Hong Kong Actor Donnie Yen walk into a bar.

They don't order anything, because between the three of them they don't have a dollar to their name.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lit_geek
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2021
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A baseball player was shopping at the dairy while in a bad mood. He'd played in a home run derby yesterday; though he got more runs than anyone else, another player was awarded the trophy. While in line at the register, the lady in front of him was short on cash. He decided to do a good deed, so...

The bitter, better-batter bought her butter!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pthelynese
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2021
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Chewbacca of Star Wars was once a great baseball player in The Major Leagues. . . . . .

Seriously, he won Wookie of the year.

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πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2021
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Who is the least acidic baseball player of all time?

Al Kaline.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PahderShameen
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2021
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Who will be the next baseball player inducted into the Hall of Fame?

Naturally

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πŸ‘€︎ u/-Masderus-
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2020
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Did you hear about the baseball player who can spot a fast food restaurant from miles away?

He leads the league in Arby eyes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JiminyKirket
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2021
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The greatest baseball player ever was a guy named Hugh McBealy, and he was most famous for every single time he came to the plate knocking the ball high over right field and into the stands.

He scored a home run every single at bat, and always the exact same way. Way over right field, too high for anyone to reach, and it always landed in exactly the 17th row of the stands, give or take a couple feet.

He earned the nickname β€œthe machine” for how consistently he hit the exact same spot every time. Right field, 17th row, every single time. He did this for 20 years before he retired. Tickets to the 2-3 seats that the ball always landed on sold for over $2k a pop by the time he retired because you were guaranteed at least a couple home run balls.

And the day he retired a reporter asked him β€œHow does it feel to be retiring as the greatest hitter of all time?”

Hugh just looked at the reporter puzzled. β€œWhat do you mean?” He said.

The reporter clarified β€œliterally over 5,000 times you went to the plate and hit a home run to right field, 17th row of the stands!”

Hugh looked dejected and disappointed β€œyeah, my greatest failure...”

β€œWhat do you mean?” Said the reporter incredulously.

Hugh let’s out a long sigh, and looked down at the ground quietly for a moment before finally speaking.

β€œI’ve been aiming left this whole time”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Frnklfrwsr
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2020
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What did the baseball player say when the flight attendant asked what seat he was in?

Put me in coach.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KinkyWaluigi
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
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Did you hear about the baseball player that is also a hacker?

They've been hitting everyone with their.bat

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πŸ‘€︎ u/saf_sy
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2020
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My brother, the pro baseball pitcher, told me about the time he intentionally walked every player on the opposing team as a protest against unfairness in life...

That took a lot of balls.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ May 20 2020
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What type of baseball player gives out all the water?

The Pitcher

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CanadianBoi0
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2019
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What is a Baseball Player's favourite kind of music?

Swing

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hexatona
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2020
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Why do baseball players shout?

Because they’re ALL IN CAPS!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/boogerknows
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2019
🚨︎ report
What does the deaf baseball player say?

I didn't catch that.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Marv1236
πŸ“…︎ Nov 20 2019
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What did the baseball player say to his son after he scored a date with a supermodel?

Nice catch.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SirMalcolmK
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2019
🚨︎ report
What's a baseball players favorite dessert?

Bunt cake

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πŸ‘€︎ u/quixxotk
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2019
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Why did the baseball player have to get treated for rabies?

Because he was around bats all the time.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MajesticSunset7
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2018
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When baseball players hock loogies while they argue with the umpires . . .

It’s a spit spat

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πŸ‘€︎ u/boogerknows
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2019
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What do you call the offspring of a baseball player?

(Say it slowly) A son of a Pitch-er

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πŸ‘€︎ u/arboleda180
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2019
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Why do the best baseball players never lock their doors?

Because they’re always safe at home

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sunniexdayzz
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2019
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What do satanic baseball players from Queens, NY call their communal showers?

Bath o’ Mets

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/J0h4n50n
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2019
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Why should you always take a baseball player fishing?

Because he is much more likely to make a great catch!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ezra611
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2019
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Have you heard about the baseball player that only drank champagne?

His name was Rosè Prosecco.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Blylan
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2019
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Why do baseball players pcik up one leg to throw the ball?

If they pick up both, they'd fall on their butt.

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πŸ“…︎ May 06 2019
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What is a baseball player's favorite kind of traffic collision?

Hit and run.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/2friends_12pizzas
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2018
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Ever hear about the Australian baseball player that has the record for being walked the most times?

He had a good eye, mate

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πŸ‘€︎ u/theWet_Bandits
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2018
🚨︎ report
How do baseball players cool down?

They stand next to the fans

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shodokan
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2016
🚨︎ report
How many baseball players does it take to hang a curtain?

One. A-Rod

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OCR9
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2018
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Who was Ryan Sherriff's (Cardinals Pitcher) favorite baseball player growing up?

David Justice (MLB Commentators provide an endless flow of Dad Jokes)

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πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2017
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A baseball player lost his job

...and became a pour pitcher

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Krieger_Saan
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2013
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Did you hear about the baseball player who was on that singing show?

He was a little pitchy.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DBones90
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2016
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