A list of puns related to "Assumed Name"
The media are calling him the Om Nom Nom de Plume.
Context: I'm in a DnD campaign, for fifth edition.
So basically, one of my characters told a horrible pun to a planetar (Massive angel-like being) over Sending (A spell letting you communicate over long distances). "Whaddya call a celestial who likes to fish? An angel-er." and then he got asked to put his journal in the box that suddenly appeared behind hm, He complied, and when he got it back his name was gone from the first page of the book, and there was a golden box, that read "Tell me what I've pun, wizard" So I'm assuming he needs to answer in some sort of pun related to his name, Klaus Hallowmantle.
However, my brain is smoother than... I can't think of anything to compare it to all of a sudden. Oh well. Anyone who can help me with this?
Soo.. a little background: my mother was about to visit for a walk outside the next day when this dialogue happened; also: my native language is german and i don't know if this very common in english as well, but my daughter calls my mother <stgm_at's-mother-first-name>-gramma. for the sake of this post let's assume her name is elizabeth.
so here goes...
(i enter the living room; wife & daughter sitting on the couch)
daughter: (in a moderately excited voice) hey dad, you know who's going to visit us tomorrow?
me: (acting as if i didn't know) don't know, who?
daughter: elizabeth-gramma.
me: huh, really, but do you know who is also going to visit us?
(daughter looks at me even more excited, there was defenitely a twinkle in her eye; wife looks at me sceptical)
daughter: don't know, who?
me: my mum.
(cue rolling eyes and groan from my wife and laughter from my daughter)
She wasnβt unusual, nor was the travel bag she carried, except for one thing. She would approach people who were sitting on the beach, glance around, then speak to them.
Generally, the people would respond negatively and she would wander off, but occasionally someone would nod and there would be a quick exchange of money for something she carried in her bag.
The couple assumed she was selling drugs and debated calling the cops, but since they didnβt know for sure they just continued to watch her.
After a couple of weeks the wife asked, βHoney, have you ever noticed that she only goes up to people with boom boxes and other electronic devices?β
He hadnβt and said so. Then she said, βTomorrow I want you to get a towel and our big radio and go lie out on the beach. Then we can find out what sheβs really doing.β
Well, the plan went off without a hitch, and the wife was almost hopping up and down with anticipation when she saw the girl talk to her husband and then leave. The man walked up the beach and met his wife at the road. βWell, is she selling drugs?β she asked excitedly.β
βNo, sheβs not.β he said, enjoying this probably more than he should have.
βWell, what is it, then?β his wife fairly shrieked.
The man grinned and said. βHer name is Sally and sheβs selling batteries.β
βBatteries?β cried the wife.
βYes,β he replied. βShe sells C cells by the Seashore.β
We are trying to come up with a name for it. My father, who we assumed was asleep on the couch in the other room, yells out "name it 'Cakes by Edith.' That way you can have your cake and Edith too." God dammit dad.
I hope this is the proper venue for this post. If not, feel free to delete me.
This came from when I was doing production lighting. Every once in a while during concert setup the audio tech would need help with mic check. Now the "real" audio guys would always just stand there going "check check check one two". Me being not a real audio guy wanted to have more fun than that, so I would always do "pages" as if I was paging people. But I would use these assumed names. Here is a partial list of names I would use. If you look closely you might notice a familiar u/name or two.
Paging Mister Lobbla β¦ Mister Bob Lobbla (from Arrested Development)
Paging Mister Vitoomey β¦ Mister Lee Vitoomey
Paging Mister Frescoe β¦ Mister Al Frescoe
Paging Miss Haivure β¦ Miss Bee Haivure
Paging Miss Mitch β¦ Miss Miranda Mitch (my random itch - from The Mick?)
Paging Miss Dactyl β¦ Miss Tara Dactyl
Paging Miss Falactec β¦ Miss Anna Falactec
Paging Miss Tonin β¦ Miss Sarah Tonin
Paging Mister Zinette β¦ Mister Ray Zinnette
Paging Mister Reader β¦ Mister Chip Reader
Paging Miss Kiaki β¦ Miss Sue Kiaki
Paging Mister Doffish β¦ Mister Stan Doffish
Paging Mister Debank β¦ Mister Robin Debank
Paging Mister Festo β¦ Mister Manny Festo
Paging Mister Ifornia β¦ Mister Cal Ifornia
Paging Mister Itosis β¦ Mister Hal Itosis
Paging Mister Saroni β¦ Mister Rye Saroni
Paging Mister Nasium β¦ Mister Jim Nasium
Paging Mister Aroon β¦ Mister Mac Aroon
Paging Miss Ester β¦ Miss Polly Ester
Paging Miss Rexia β¦ Miss Anna Rexia
Paging Mister Zapan β¦ Mister Pete Zapan
Paging Mister Tenuff β¦ Mister Jess Tenuff
Paging Miss Eous β¦ Miss Elaine Eous
Paging Mister Aroni β¦ Mister Mac Aroni
Paging Mister Preneur β¦ Mister Andre Preneur
Paging Mister Cetera β¦ Mister Ed Cetera
Paging Mr. Zapple β¦ Mr. Adam Zapple
Paging Mr. Bino β¦ Mr. Al Bino
Paging Miss Slapter β¦ Miss Ida Slapter
Paging Miss Talia β¦ Miss Jenna Talia
Paging Mr. Rafone β¦ Mr. Mike Rafone
Paging Mr. Zark β¦ Mr. Noah Zark
Paging Miss Yoki β¦ Miss Carey Yoki
Paging Mr. Foolery β¦ Mr. Tom Foolery
Paging Mr. Atric β¦ Mr. Jerry Atric
Paging Mr. Duttank β¦ Mr. Phillip Duttank
Paging Mr. Anoma β¦ Mr. Mel Anoma
Paging Mister Jass β¦ Mr. Hugh Jass
Paging Mr. Onella β¦ Mr. Sam Onella
Paging Mr. Maphobe β¦ Mr. Jer Maphobe
Paging Mr. Packa β¦ Mr. Al Packa
Paging Mister Dente β¦ Mister Al Dente
Paging Miss Conda β¦ Miss Anna Conda
Paging Miss Sharalike β¦ Miss Sharon Sharalike
Paging Miss Bellum β¦ Miss Sarah Bellum
Paging Miss Mennopey β¦ Miss
... keep reading on reddit β‘He ran around back of my truck then started crying. I'm assuming he touched the tailpipe.
I asked him "are you okay?"
He said "no I'm Link".
So proud of him he's only 3 1/2. Lol
(His name is Link. No bamboozle)
I was visiting a friend in Copenhagen, Denmark. As we were having a walk, a shop piqued my interest with the name Loke (which I assumed was one way to spell Loki's name, the Norse God of mischief).
Me: What's that shop over there? Friend: That? It's a bike shop. Me: for Bikings?
Groans and threats to be thrown off the nearby bridge were made.
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