A list of puns related to "Asap"
Markus
My momβs friend is trying to write a card for her husband for Valentineβs Day, and he loves gnomes. Shes trying to find gnome puns to put in the card associated with Valentineβs Day. Please help because I donβt know any good gnome puns.
Iβve got to hand it to him, that was pretty bold.
(Are Sometimes A Problem).
... that we eat first and March 2nd.
An end to acronyms!
When do we want it?
ASAP!
"A$AP Rocky released from prison and on his way home to the United States from Sweden. It was a Rocky Week, get home ASAP A$AP!"
ASAP
ASAP
LEARN CHINESE IN 5 MINUTES (You MUST read them out loud or it doesnt make as much sense)...
I picked up a head cold from my toddler and was worried about it progressing to something worse. Texted my doc, and he said to come in ASAP. That afternoon, he prescribed for me some cough meds, and a nasal steroid to help with the blockage.
I get home, and after putting the still-snotty kiddo to bed, my wife and I retreated to the boudoir to talk and relax. She wanted to know what Doc prescribed. She gave me the perfect setup for a dad joke.
Me: Oh, some pearls and codeine for the cough, and a steroid spray for my nose.
Wife: Where is it?
Me: (pointing at nose) It's right here in the middle of my face.
She laughed. Good thing we were far enough away we didn't wake up the kid.
"I need to book an appointment asap, its about an ongoing toothache"
"Thats fine sir, the earliest we have is at 11 am Tuesday if thats ok with you?"
Dad- "Are you sure you heard me correctly? I said toothache, I need the appropriate time slot for that type of appointment,"
"What do you mean sir? What would be your preferred time and I can see if there's an availability"
Dad- "Two-thirty"
Wife is sick, so we went to the walk-in clinic in town. While in the waiting room, I took the 7 month old to go look at their giant fish tank where I sadly found one laying flat on the bottom not moving. So I went to the front desk to give them a heads up. I said
"Hey I don't know if you guys know but you have a fish over laying on the bottom not moving."
The lady said oh no that's not good, we should call the maintenance guy.
I said "Yeah I don't know if you guys have a swim-up clinic or not, but I'd get him checked in ASAP."
Groans all around!
"Ho ho ho...Hey kids this is Santa Claus and I need to know what you want for Christmas ASAP! It is okay to text your Dad back since my phone is broken and I am chillin' in the North Pole with him - get it chillin' in the North Pole (I am the second funniest guy I know, your dad of course is the funniest) p.s. nice job staying off the naughty list."
http://i.imgur.com/LDpkF0m.jpg?1
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