Once I was in a yogurt shop minding my own business, when I heard a couple of women talking in an interesting accent at one of the nearby tables.

I glanced over and noticed that they were quite attractive. A little on the larger side, but that never stopped me before. So, yogurt cup in hand, I boldly approached their table.

β€œExcuse me,” I said, β€œI couldn’t help but overhear your conversation, and I noticed your lovely accents. Are you two ladies from Scotland by any chance?”

They immediately bristled at my question, obviously offended, and one of them snapped at me, β€œIt’s Wales!”

β€œNo offense intended,” I replied. β€œPlease allow me to try again...are you two whales from Scotland?”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/schoonerw
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
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read β€œtwix” in a child accent it makes the meme better
πŸ‘︎ 144
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2020
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I love British accents (from /r/lgballt)
πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nachog2003
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2020
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Reading it with an accent like Sean Connery cracks me up!
πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tribelawn
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2020
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Where do pirates put the French accent mark cedilla?

Under the sea.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dz_moneyman
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2020
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A man with a Mexican accent is delivering snails to a French restaurant.

He's pulled over for having a broken tail light and before the officer lets him go he asks "what's in this truck anyway?"

Escargot.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AyoRobo
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2020
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What do you call a Nordic cyclist with a Filipino accent?

Biking.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/STMIonReddit
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13 2020
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In honor of my father for Father’s Day, I’m going to tack you back to the 1990’s. This is rural southern America please read in southern accent.

Me: Daddy I’m thirsty!

My dad: Hi thirsty I’m Fridy lets go Saturdy and get a Sundy.

I’m sure it’s not original but it makes me laugh to think of how I was making my dad insane asking for a DRIIINNNKKK and he would always come back with this.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kayl6
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2020
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What does a crow with a jersey accent say to the man about to step into traffic?

"CAW! CAW!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LeWiggler
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2020
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I like jokes that make fun of accents. You like jokes that don't work in text form.

Potato potato.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ryanooooo
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2020
🚨︎ report
I had my front door replaced with a door entirely made out of chocolate with a ganache handle and caramel accents.

Don't knock it until you've tried it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/johnblu5
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2019
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A pun about eyeballs or a pun about Australian accents?

Which one is cornea?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TLo137
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2019
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I bought an accent table, but I can’t understand a word it is saying.
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2019
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Accent walls should be called y’all walls
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bcowburn
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2019
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So a Californian man has been in Boston for quite some time and has picked up on their accent a bit.

He was discussing vehicles with his friend and his friend asked if he had a truck. The Californian man responds, β€œno, but I avocado”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/fireflamingos
πŸ“…︎ Oct 10 2019
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Two people with amnesia and bad accents were arguing who was Chris and who was Wong.

The second person eventually said: "Sorry. I'm Wong."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JustTryHard_inc
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2019
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Brit advocates are good Lawyers (accent!)

Liars geddit?

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/evamPUNdit
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2019
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He has a British accent.
πŸ‘︎ 45
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πŸ‘€︎ u/EatYourReddit
πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2018
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Cow wash is just car wash with a Boston accent
πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Yugvijay
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2018
🚨︎ report
Said in grandfathers New England accent.

Grandfather- I'm making chili. You know how many beans to put in it?

Me- no idea.

Grandfather- 239, any more and it becomes too farty.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tin-Spider
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2019
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The kids asked me why our Alexa in the basement has an Australian accent

Me: "Because the basement is down under the house"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nerd_of_gods
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2019
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β€œYour accent makes you sound like you’re from the USSR.”

β€œThen Soviet.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheSebtacular
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Our waitress lastnight had an interesting accent...

Eventually my Dad said "I think she's Russian." Without missing a beat I replied "huh, she doesn't seem to be that busy." Cue loud groans and moans from the rest of the table.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/eericwhitee
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2016
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(In Scottish Accent) What's wrong with Mickey Mouse's helicopter...

Disneyland

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/keano1205
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2018
🚨︎ report
It's difficult to understand my friend's accent
πŸ‘︎ 194
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Asmor
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2016
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What did the driver with the cockney accent tell the one armed, three headed hitchhiker?

'Allo, 'allo, 'allo! You seem 'armless enough. 'Op in!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cheersfolks
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2018
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I recently bought an accent chair made in Scotland...

I can't understand a single thing it says!

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/radlee
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2018
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From my father, an American immigrant from Portugal, so read the joke in a Portuguese Accent

"There's about to be a lot of shit happening right now"

"What happened"

"I'm going to the bathroom"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NickisHades
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2018
🚨︎ report
Say "beer can" with an English accent...

I just taught you how to say "bacon" with a Jamaican accent!

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/cymyk
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2017
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Girls love guys with accents
πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/trendless
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2011
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