The Cell Puns

A list of puns related to "The Cell"

My sister, the biologist, was studying cell division when she dropped her microscope on my toe.

Mitosis!

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👤︎ u/mkrjoe
📅︎ Dec 08 2020
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Why did the cell phone have to wear glasses?

Because it lost its contacts

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👤︎ u/WorldlyContribution
📅︎ Oct 02 2020
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What did the cell say to the other cell who stepped on its foot?

Ouch, mitosis!

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👤︎ u/KhalCottonCandy
📅︎ Oct 25 2020
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My cell signal always drops when I work the front desk at work and I can't get calls.

Bad reception.

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👤︎ u/melmia88
📅︎ Sep 22 2020
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The real reason new cell phones break easy is because of gravity.

No phone back then was subject to multiple Gs and now we're up to 5G!

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👤︎ u/Leebo
📅︎ Aug 25 2020
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My wife and 2yo were just watching Paw Patrol. There is a cow mooing into a cell phone to video chat with the team to ask for help for a cat stuck on the roof.

I told my wife "That cat would have way more grip on roof shingles and I expect more I realism from talking cartoon cows. This is "UDDERLY" ridiculous."

She may have buried her head and avoided eye contact for a bit. I was proud.

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👤︎ u/trich101
📅︎ Aug 23 2020
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What does the cell say to his sister when she steps on his toe?

Oh my toe sis!

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👤︎ u/dulfuckyourself
📅︎ Jul 29 2020
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What's the name of the largest cell service provider for alien life forms?

ET&T

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👤︎ u/Youwantfuckame
📅︎ Apr 02 2020
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What was the cell phone provider's baby's first word ?

DA TA

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👤︎ u/Johnny_Two_Timez
📅︎ May 16 2020
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What did the first African cell phone user say to other African cell phone user?

Kenya here me now?

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👤︎ u/jspittman
📅︎ Apr 27 2020
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Me and my ex cell mates talk all the time.

We like to talk about spreadsheets.

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👤︎ u/InkJetPrinters
📅︎ Mar 29 2020
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How do you determine the sex of a cell?

You pull down it's genes

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👤︎ u/t_brad32
📅︎ Dec 06 2019
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What did one deoxygenated blood cell say to the other?

We're all in vain

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👤︎ u/Amphibatron
📅︎ Oct 03 2019
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My grandfather was captured by the Germans in WWII. Being a high-ranking officer, they kept him captive for months but all he would do is sit in his cell saying "tick... tick... tick...". Their top interrogator was sent in to get important information out of him...

When in the interrogation room, he told my grandfather

"vee haf vays of making you tock!"

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👤︎ u/FaultyData
📅︎ Sep 15 2019
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You've heard that the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell...

But did you know that in October, the frightochondria is the haunted house of the cell?

^(And the mitochondriana is the powerhouse of the stage.)

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👤︎ u/Bron-Strock-n-roll
📅︎ Dec 11 2019
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What did God say to the cell when he handed it a nucleus

Eukaryote

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👤︎ u/ruscheinskyc
📅︎ Aug 14 2019
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Did you hear about the two cells who were dating?

They split up

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👤︎ u/GaryTheKnight
📅︎ Aug 01 2019
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Why did all the passengers on the right side of the ship have dead cell phones?

They weren’t on the port side of the ship.

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👤︎ u/GotMyOrangeCrush
📅︎ Nov 12 2019
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What do you call it when Kublai becomes the powerhouse of the cell?

Mitokhandria

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👤︎ u/ShowPan69
📅︎ Nov 02 2019
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What did the somatic cell say to its sister after it banged its toe against the table?

Ow mitosis!

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👤︎ u/pikachuusethunda
📅︎ Oct 21 2019
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Type O blood was actually meant to be Type Zero blood, due to lack of glycoproteins in the red blood cells. It was misread as type “O”.

I guess we can call it a typo.

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👤︎ u/Evilpuddingman
📅︎ Jan 20 2019
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What did the cell say when its foot split in two?

"Ow! My toeses!"

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👤︎ u/IncompotentCyborg
📅︎ Feb 20 2019
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We're about to scrape the old paint off to repaint the bars of the jail cells.

This calls for cell abrasion.

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👤︎ u/thefizzynator
📅︎ Jun 14 2018
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I wish the Master Sword could be used as a cell phone for Link.

At least there'd be a one-time only Fi...

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👤︎ u/ElsaFrozen2013
📅︎ Jan 07 2019
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I opened my cell phone to see the battery

And the battery was the mitophonedria

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👤︎ u/Drolkradeht
📅︎ Mar 07 2019
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What is the process by which cells do not replicate

Fooleosis

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👤︎ u/LoedTachanka21
📅︎ Feb 11 2019
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Did you hear about the prisoner who escaped after dismantling his cell?

They're calling it self defence.

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👤︎ u/SilentIntrusion
📅︎ Feb 10 2019
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Court Chester: Cell of the Century

Chester, the defendant, stood in front of the judge's imposing bench, waiting patiently for the reason why he was there. To further muddle the moment, he stared at items unfamiliar to him, at least in that context.

Perched on and near His Honor's desk were the following: A DuraLast Ultra in one car with a long, black cord stretching to another car, several alkaline D cells plugged into a black box, and lastly, a cell phone with its cord sticking into the wall.

Finally removing Chester's questioned look was his attorney leaning into his ear to whisper, "It's official, now: You're facing battery charges."

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👤︎ u/bradstros
📅︎ Mar 27 2019
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What is the smartest cell in the body?

A STEM cell.

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👤︎ u/rover359
📅︎ May 18 2018
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[OC] Did you hear about the chemist who was arrested for making a pair of electrochemical cells?

He was charged with a salt and battery.

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👤︎ u/minetruly
📅︎ Aug 04 2018
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Son, your daddy's going to be home soon. The prison ran out of metal furniture so they assigned me to a cell with with an inflatable bed.

It's an air-rested development.

Love, Dad

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👤︎ u/Torley_
📅︎ Jul 30 2018
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What did the mRNA say to the cell?

Uracil

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👤︎ u/gokugamer16
📅︎ Apr 25 2018
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Why did no one enjoy the cell phone's wedding?

The reception was terrible.

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👤︎ u/twelvebars
📅︎ Jul 24 2017
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What did the cell say to his sister cell when she stepped on his foot?

Mitosis

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👤︎ u/InevitableCringe
📅︎ Oct 05 2019
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What did the cell say to his sister cell when she stepped on his toe?

Mitosis

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👤︎ u/Ihatepayingtaxes
📅︎ Sep 22 2018
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What did the plant cell say to its sister when she stepped on its foot?

watch mitosis!

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👤︎ u/floofysox
📅︎ May 24 2019
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What did the cell say to its sister when she stepped on its foot?

Mitosis

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👤︎ u/priv_rex
📅︎ Jun 20 2018
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What did the cell say when his sister stepped on his foot?

Mitosis!

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👤︎ u/WhiteNerdyDelitesome
📅︎ Dec 17 2018
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What did the cell say when his sibling stepped on his foot?

Mitosis!

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👤︎ u/marty___mcfly
📅︎ Nov 20 2018
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What did the cell say to his sister cell that stepped on his toe?

Mitosis

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👤︎ u/BadW0lf-52
📅︎ Jun 11 2017
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What did the cell say when his sister stepped on his foot?

Mitosis

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👤︎ u/JDiazM89
📅︎ Jun 23 2018
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