Iโ€™ve been having to use lettuce as TP since the Covid craziness

The worst part is the news says this is just the tip of the iceberg and what I need to use as TP tomorrow romaines to be seen. Stay safe kids, Dad

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Bradb717
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 29 2020
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I found out why everyone is collecting TP

Itโ€™s because an asteroid might hit us next month. ..... and ... paper always beats rock

๐Ÿ‘︎ 69
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/StaggerLee194D
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 25 2020
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Growing up, my Dad was King of the TP empire.

I guess that makes me Prince Charmin.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 16
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TheSaltyDave
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 12 2020
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I don't know why so people are buying so much TP

But I wish someone would get to the bottom of it.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 12
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Ryden22
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 19 2020
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TP'd TiPi
๐Ÿ‘︎ 19
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/SlimDickMcFatNuts
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 26 2020
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Please forgive me for my inability tp resist.
๐Ÿ‘︎ 95
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/the_second_choice
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 18 2019
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All these peeps rushing out to buy TP...

... such crap

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Rachelsfriendfriend
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 08 2020
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UA /TP HAV /SK CLR /TB LGT /IC CLR /WV 120010 ; UA /TP PAP /SK SCT /TB MDT /WV 080025 /FL 020 ; UA /TP KIN /SK OVC /TB SVR /WV 240050 /FL 03

These are the PIREPs of the Caribbean.

๐Ÿ‘︎ 5
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/DocDerz
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 31 2019
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My girlfriend got invited to TP someone's house by a friend.

Being poor, starving, university students, I said "Why would you waste perfectly good toilet paper?" to which she replies "C'mon dude, don't be a party pooper."

groaning intensifies

๐Ÿ‘︎ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/JaeqPiegDeivys
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 04 2014
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Why was the Native American crying in the outhouse?

Cause the government stole his TP

๐Ÿ‘︎ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Sharetheroadplz
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 13 2021
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The Costco employee said "I'm sorry Sir, we're rationing.

[Looking over cart full of TP]

Me: "Nice to meet you Rationing, I'm Hoarding"

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/robinson217
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 13 2020
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Public places never have shitty toilet paper...

until you use it.

Edit: I came up with this whole using a public restroom that have the worst tp.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/V2Slash
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 01 2019
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Found this here a while ago:

My grandparent grew up in the Soviet Union. One cloudy day, as they were walking down the street perception started falling.

My grandmother thought it was snow, while my grandfather thought it was rain.

Their passionate arguing was noticed by the local head of the Communist Party of the Soviet Union, a good friend named Rudolph.

After they told him of their dispute, Rudolph stated that it was in fact rain.

With a smile on his face my grandfather turned tp his wife, and said: "You see, Rudolph the Red knows rain dear"

๐Ÿ‘︎ 10
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/mike_the_hun
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 05 2017
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My uncle hit my cousin with this yesterday.

http://i.imgur.com/DKPosTP.jpg

๐Ÿ‘︎ 24
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/mudboy7
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 08 2014
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GF's dad dropped this on me

Telling joke to gf when my girlfriends dad tells me to check my coat pocket I do and find a roll of TP Girlfriend's dad promptly retorts "I am on a roll."

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Bochekz
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 11 2014
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Taken from the "Aron Ralston, who amputated arm to escape canyon, jailed in Denver" Thread. Seems like a dad joke.

http://i.imgur.com/iJlDlTP.jpg

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Larrry_David
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 09 2013
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