Why does Hamas hate slush ice?

It's a two state solution.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VladTheBuilder
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2018
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My son is saving his money for an Icee.

It's a slush fund.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/teeim
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2020
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Robin Williams Dad Jokes Mike Rowe

Mike Rowe on meeting Robin Williams the first time:

The first was in 2006 - June or maybe July. I walked into The Roastery down on Chestnut, ordered a coffee, and sat down to read the paper. I soon discovered I was in one of those chairs with one leg shorter than the rest, and resolved to remedy the problem by jamming a folded-up coaster under the offending limb. I bent down, got the thing positioned properly, and managed to smack my head on the edge of the table on the way back up. Hard. The impact was noisy, and sent coffee slushing all over The Chronicle, which in turn lead to an β€œAhh...shit!,” a little louder than I intended. A second later, a voice said, β€œNo, I believe that’s coffee. Shit’s the stuff I see you crawling through every time I turn on the TV.”

source

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πŸ‘€︎ u/silentex
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2014
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Dad joke at Sonic

Ordered two frozen drinks at Sonic, go to swipe my card and the card-reader is out of order. Girlfriend asks if I have any cash, so I open the ash compartment in my car and pull out a 5 dollar bill.

"I didn't even know you kept money in there!"

"Well you aren't supposed to know about it, just like any good slush fund."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/chillbroswaggins
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2014
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