What do you call a doughnut filled with glue?

A Paste-ry

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ipenrod
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 29 2020
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Recently revived my desire to watch Viking shows.

My interest was Bjorn again.

Hate this pun? I have no reNorse.

Thor-ry (Not Thor-ry).

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Konamicoder
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 07 2020
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Why do Japanese restaurants never last

Because they are tempura-ry

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/marney2013
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 16 2020
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My son was born today (totally true story)

A couple of hours later, I text my wife

"I don't want to alarm you, but I'm the hospital"

edit: the original message

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Einstine1984
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 23 2019
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Spin Me Round
πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Barthock
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 31 2018
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What do You call an army of child soldiers?

Infant-ry

πŸ‘οΈŽ 14
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/AnEdgyPie
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 17 2018
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You know, why don't they enlist babies in the military?

I mean, there's a reason they called it the INFANTry.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Cryptolites
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 02 2017
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What did the drill sergeant do with his newborn when the babysitter cancelled?

Took him to the infant-ry

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/chandler404
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 13 2017
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When my dad forgets my name...

I walk into the room, and my dad almost calls me by my older brother's name (we look a lot alike).

Dad: Oh hey Ry... uh.. Chuck, Henry, Fred. What do we call you again?

Me: Thanks dad..

Dad: I like Fred, I'll call you Fred. He chuckles and says: Go help bring in groceries.

Me: .....

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/steviefrench
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 08 2013
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[X-Post /r/webcomics] Ordering Steaks

http://i.imgur.com/RyC5ON0.jpg

Creator: www.maximumble.com

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/JDMcompliant
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 08 2015
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Ryan is taking a bath.

Ryan's dad says to the mom, "Ryan wants you to wash his hair."

"Ugh!" she replies, "I'd rather lie in bed."

"I know you would," says dad, "but I'd lather Ry instead."

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/HughJamerican
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 17 2016
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I got my dad while watching a suspense show

The characters walk into a room with ears hanging from the ceiling. I slowly turn around, smile, and say "That room is pretty ear-ry"

I them laughed sy my own dumb joke for the next couple of minutes

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/CaptainQWO
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 29 2015
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