Why is the goalkeeper richer than all the other players

He’s good at saving

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tommotal
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2020
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Why is Ireland Always Getting Richer?

It's capital is always Dublin!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LordofMostCows
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2017
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Two little boys were at a wedding. One leaned over and asked "How many wives can a man have?"

The other answered "16. Four better, four worse, four richer, four poorer"

πŸ‘︎ 36
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πŸ‘€︎ u/twoboxingfiend
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2020
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A short essay on the benefits of beating the shit out of each other β€” A satirical essay based on a single, overplayed pun

In my opinion we should beat the shit out of constipated people because:

  1. Laxatives are an unhealthy way of dealing with feces. On the other hand, beating the shit out of someone is a good way to practice sports activities like, running, grip strength, punching techniques etc.

  2. Other methods of dealing with feces take alot of money. Laxatives aren't cheap in our flawed healthcare system! On the other hand, there are people that are willing to pay you to beat the shit out of you. By using this method you can become richer and deal with your shitty problems.

  3. Constipation requires being in the bathroom for a long time. This can be very lonely for the people involved. However, beating the shit out of others can be done in any place. Your home, the local park, or even the shady street corner! Not only that it's a very social activity, requiring a minimum of at least 2 people, but usually done in groups of 2-5 people.

Although some people might say, that beating the shit out of each other is violent, most of them have never been to a public toilet and hence are unable to realize how much more painful and violent the alternative is.

In summery, beating the shit out of people is a good, legitimate, and affordable alternative to laxatives and is a better, more progressive way, to deal with constipation.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/a5paperblank
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2020
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Put some white gold in my nose tonight

Two ply charmin for my nose bleed. Never felt richer.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BobboLJ386
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2020
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The Vice President, his brother, his wife, and their three children were all short on cash so they went to their local church for help. The preacher said he couldn’t spot that many people but pointed them to someone wealthier, who could: Sister Mary.

β€œSIX Pence? Nun the richer.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/howardstackhouse
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2018
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We brought our sons to their first wedding and after the service...

Little Joey asked his brother, "How many women can a man marry?"

"Sixteen." Tommy responded.

"How do you know that?"

"Easy." Tommy said. "All you have to do is add it up, like the priest said, 4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2017
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Did you know you can legally marry sixteen women?

My dad at a recent family gathering:

"Did you know you can legally marry sixteen women?
Four better, four worse, four richer, and four poorer".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/richman241
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2014
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9 out of 10 moms prefer NASA brand spaghetti sauce...

...for its richer meteor flavor.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2015
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My sister got married the other day and now has 16 husbands....

Four richer, four poorer, four better and four worse...

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2019
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How many wives can a man have?

Sixteen: Four better, four worse, four richer, four poorer.

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jan_Tik
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2019
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