but it always ends up two in tents
So I asked her if she could lax again.
Except maybe Beytwice.
Apparently she's not a big fan of 'Let It Go'
Me: my name isn’t David.
Doctor: I know. I’m David.
Solo
Where do meteorologists relax after work? At the isobar!
They were always disappointed when I showed them it was just a regular deck with dog poop on it.
Just “chill axe”, my dude.
I asked her if it was going to be full color or just a sketch.
"A.S.M....'ARRR!"
It was chilling in the fridge.
The grape. He was the only one who went raisin.
You know I would raise these super cute fluffy bunnies!
People would always ask me how it was: was it relaxing, fun, nice, a bore etc...?
I would always respond that it was honestly terrifying, like really scary.
People in bewilderment would always say: "what? scary? how can that be??"
I would respond: "well, it was hare raising"
Sometimes, I just knead a brake.
It's called a casual tea
Draw themselves a bath
A Cowch
Because you will see nothing if you sit behind it.
I’ll call it my No Worries Atoll.
It’s two tents.
Not really relaxing as my eyes are in pain, but I managed to make out "60 Watts - Made in China".
Calmer, calmer, calmer, calmer, calmer chameleon.
I’m easily swayed.
And chill out.
U and i on vacation
She said, "Picnic."
"Jesus," I said, 'I always knew you fancied him."
The doctor said it was terminal
Lovely woman.
Useless surgeon.
Relax, I got a handle on it
The SAI of relief
The CHILLEST
But it'll dissappear in a flash with all the other jokes here
Back in the before times, when sit-down restaurants existed, I used to order boneless cheese sticks and would just throw the word "boneless" in front of any appetizer with 100% corniness. The purpose of this isn't to make a good joke. It's not a good joke. The purpose is to make my dining companions catch some cringe splash damage and want to crawl into a hole and die out of embarrassment for my being horribly corny.
But there is a real, deeper purpose that I've discovered entirely by accident. People, especially young people, are so self-conscious and worried about saying or doing something embarrassing that it taints a lot of social gatherings. They go to a restaurant and are afraid to speak up even when their order is blatantly wrong. They'll tip well even when the food took an hour to arrive and the server has disappeared into the corn stalks behind a baseball field. It takes 2 hours of hanging out together before some friends finally stop nitpicking themselves, uncomfortable in their own bodies and brains, feeling perpetually judged, and begin to relax. These are the kinds of people who go to sleep every night replaying cringey moments from high school. Their last thought of the day is when the Burger King girl said, "Enjoy your meal!" and they said, "Thanks, you too."
It takes 2 hours and/or a lot of booze before they're comfortable enough to take conversational risks and truly reveal themselves. But if I come right out of the gate with a really dumb joke, then we can cut to the chase. There's less danger because someone in the group already shot themselves in the foot, right off the bat. They pulled a pin on the cringe grenade and then jumped on it.
You cringe at my dumb joke and then we're over the hump. Someone has already done something pretty stupid, so go ahead and order the hubcap of nachos and a massive chocolate shake because nobody is going to judge you poorly while they're all judging me.
In terms of price negotiations (haggling), there is a psychological concept called "anchoring". You throw out the first number and all subsequent numbers are compared to that number. This is the same idea. We've already set the humor standard pretty low at "boneless cheese sticks", so you can say the dumbest shit you want and, as long as it's not worse than my cheesy joke, it won't matter.
This is why, when you were a teenager and your dad took you and some friends out, your dad made corny jokes. He knew they were corny jokes. You and your friends un
... keep reading on reddit ➡I said, no. I always lax right the first time.
My wife just now, relaxing after we got the kids to sleep: Do we have any toast?
Me: No, but we have bread!
Wife: 😐 *silence*
Me: I'll just see myself out. *laughing all the way to the pantry*
Not really relaxing as my eyes are in pain, but I managed to make out “60 Watts - Made in China”.
