Psst, hey kid. I can sell you a puppet real cheap.
No strings attached!
Psst guys, I know this isn't the place but, want to buy a little pot? link to proof picture
I bought shoes from my drug dealer...
I don't know what he's laced them with but I've been tripping all day.
A slice of apple pie is $2.00 in Jamaica, and $2.50 in the Bahamas.
These are the Pie Rates of the Caribbean.
Which side of the chicken has more feathers?
The outside.
What did the one brick say to the other brick?
Psst! I've just got laid.
Watching Finding Nemo with my dad and little bro when...
Setting: movie theater during the "fish are friends" scene; aka heavy talking
(Dad) psst
(Me) what
(Dad) where do fish go to have a drink
(Me) not able to hear dialogue Idc shhhh
(Dad) a can-tuna
(Me) goddammit
EDIT: Thanks for getting me to the frontpage of /r/dadjokes for a day! I'm glad you all benefitted from my pain!
